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NOTICE: MOST OF MY POSTING IS ON FACEBOOK: STARTLOVING1

My most personal Thoughts: sloving
(Start Loving, the pka for James McGinley)

The most crucial posts: *****

Photo album: here

EFLIUS (Exploring For Life In US): here

12.22.2012

***** Thru tears - GOD BLESS YOU!! CBS: Newtown parents reject NRA plan CBS News

Newtown parents reject NRA plan

CBS News - ‎59 minutes ago‎
NEWTOWN, Conn. When Adam Lanza started his lethal attack on Sandy Hook Elementary School, Andrei Nikitchyuk's eight year-old son and another third grader were on their way to the principal's office.

'12.22.12: Friends: There can be no chemo. Less than 100% is ECOCIDE, from any of us now.' Loving

'12.22.12: Friends: There can be no chemo.  Less than 100% is ECOCIDE, from any of us now.'  Loving

To C., Pat., Doc M, and other friends, (and to myself!  LOL), to whom I've yet to be sufficiently clear - 

Principal Dawn, in Newtown.  Nothing less than 100% was acceptable to her, or from her last week.

We have 200 billion children yet to be born, and 4 billion currently on earth.  There is a 20% chance that it is already too late for them, that we've passed tipping points through our collective, criminal, CRIMINAL, PATHOLOGICAL, AFFLOHOLIC, collective inaction the last 40 years, 30 years, 20 years, 10 years, 4 years, 1 year, 11 months, 10 months... that the scientists have been categorically SCREAMING at us that allowing Green House Gas emissions is the slow motion equivalent of unleashing global thermo-nuclear war on planet Earth, on our children's future, FOREVERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR. 

But there is an 80% chance that if we act now, in the first months of 2013, they, our 204 billion children can be shared that unmitigated, eternal, perpetual, daily Hell.

There is not a snowballs chance in Hell that we will do so, that we fathers, mothers, brothers, sisters, aunts, uncles... will pass the Legislation to end the free, no cost to the dumper, dumping of Green House Gas, smothering the Garden of Eden, forever, that we've all enjoyed.

But as long as anyone stands, Diane Wilson, me, someone, anyone... a snowball's chance in hell for them, exists.

For reasons I don't question for a moment, chemo can not legally be administered to me, or anyone, without a residence, even a shelter, for reasons of legal, financial liability to the doctor, and the hospital.

And I cannot meet that requirement, because other than for 4-8 hours per 2 week period, or possible emergency care from time to time, I cannot be away from the vigil.

Principal Dawn, in Newtown.  Nothing less than 100% was acceptable to her, or from her last week.  This, for only her 600 children.

I've got 204 billion children.  The current certainty is that the slim chance they have to avert Ecocide, torture, and death will be gone in months.  Nothing less than 100% is possible from me now.  There can be no chemo. There will be no chemo for me.

'Having little time left, I desperately need help with two projects. I must not leave them unfinished." Loving

'Having little time left, I desperately need help with two projects.  I must not leave them unfinished."  Loving

"Tomorrow is promised to no person."

For years I've had two projects I desperately needed to complete but I've not had the resource to do so, and now I'm running out of time.  I need your help.  Then my Library that I leave to you will be complete:  http://jesusgodgoodetcnjay.blogspot.com/p/library.html

I need an excellent computer file of these two books scanned:

The abreviated version of "Social and Cultural Dynamics," Pitirim Sorokin:  http://www.amazon.com/The-Ways-Power-Love-Transformation/dp/1890151866

"The Ways and Power of Love," Pitirim Sorokin:  http://www.amazon.com/Social-Cultural-Dynamics-Pitirim-Sorokin/dp/0875580297

For convenience I've linked to Amazon, but as with every $ you spend, spend it to create jobs, not eliminate them - ;get them from a local book seller.

I can provide to you the scanning software and instructions.

I also need these for my own study - the scanned files.

If you, or someone you know feels passionate called to give this support, let me know, and I'll figure how to get you the scanning software.

Loving

12.21.2012

12.21.12 Back on Post. Dying of Cancer. Pray for me that I stop the Ecocide, First.

Back at the vigil, thank Goodness!  Away for way toooo long.

High winds, wind chill 31 going down to 24 by morning.  Brrrrr.

They haven't told me how long I have with the cancer.  With the chemo - 50% chance of 5 more years.  Without?  Well, quite a bit less, I'll guess.  And chemo looks quite out of the question because the vigil cannot stop, not now.

Cancer - Chemo? NOW? For me!?!? Out of the question - 12.19.12



I went to the hospital immediately that I arrived in DC to cancel the tests and treatment that was scheduled.  I first, however, met with a Patient Navigator, a fellow Christ-ian, that is not at all pleased with the prospects of me departing in body, quite so soon.  I made clear to her that I am not refusing chemo. But, I'm unable to depart from the vigil.

There may be a way.  Enough of a sliver of a chance that I haven't yet cancelled the tests and treatment meeting, as I'd planned.  There is within 4 blocks of the vigil a set-aside portion of a much larger homeless shelter that is called the "infirmary."   It may be that unlike shelters, it is sufficiently less restrictive that I could meet the legal requirements of the hospital, being sheltered, and still maintain the vigil.  It would be pretty miserable, chemo, without support, but that is of no consequence.  Christ-mass on Tuesday will slow down the ability to evaluate this option, but by mid to late week things should be clearer.

I have zero aversion to trading 3 to 20 years of my life for the next 6 month, to keep my body in the way, now, in these most precious, decisive, consequential days in all human history, here in front of the Embassy, the poster child for our criminally insane pursuit of future eradicating fossil fuels. 

But I am NEVER called to be casual with my life, nor anyone elses.   So this unexpected, last option, as unlikely as it is, will be given it's due consideration.

With much Joy and Relief to be back in Harm's Way,

Loving

Michelle Obama's letter to Newtown: 'My heart aches for you' Today.com

Michelle Obama's letter to Newtown: 'My heart aches for you'

Today.com (blog) - ‎4 hours ago‎
A week after the Newtown school shooting in which a young man fatally shot 27 people - 20 of them children - Michelle Obama has penned an open letter to Newtown residents. Titled “Holding You in Our Hearts,” the first lady praises the heroism shown by ...

nd 'I just 'got' "let the dead burry the dead." Waging Love is a Life and Death EMERGENCY.' Loving

nd 'I just 'got' "let the dead burry the dead."  Waging Love is a Life and Death EMERGENCY.'  Loving

12.20.2012

nd 'I, am a Christ-ian; NOT a christian (my brothers and sisters all), but a Christ-ian. I Worship ONLY Christ, the Spirit of Loving, as Jesus taught in his words, and exemplified, best.' Loving

nd 'I, am a Christ-ian; NOT a christian (my brothers and sisters all), but a Christ-ian. I Worship ONLY Christ, the Spirit of Loving, as Jesus taught in his words, and exemplified, best.' Loving

"ND" = No Detail - Don't click link for detail. :-)

"ND" = No Detail - Don't click link for detail.  :-)

nd 'The 'Creator:' that which is Loving.' Loving

nd 'The 'Creator:'  that which is Loving.'  Loving

***** nd 'Jesus could reach ONLY the Dead, and Dying; not the well. Today also.' Loving

nd 'Jesus could reach ONLY the Dead, and Dying; not the well.  Today also.' Loving

***** nd 'The 2nd Coming of Christ, the Spirit of Loving-our-neediest: The ONLY Hope left. The one thing left untried.' Loving

***** nd 'The 2nd Coming of Christ, the Spirit of Loving-our-neediest:  The ONLY Hope left.  The one thing left untried.'  Loving

nd 'What's with Loving, re Ecocide?!?!? "I'm unwilling to accept even one more death. NO LEVEL of risk is acceptable. This is my Family." ' Loving

nd 'What's with Loving, re Ecocide?!?!?  "I'm unwilling to accept even one more death.  NO LEVEL of risk is acceptable.  This is my Family." ' Loving

SPECTACULAR: Photos of Pr. Obama presidency TIME

http://lightbox.time.com/2012/10/08/pete-souza-portrait-of-a-presidency/?xid=gonewsedit&google_editors_picks=true#1

12.19.2012

***** nd 'Life begins when ENVY of, replaces Gratitude for, the likes of Jesus, Newtown teachers.... ONLY then.' Loving

***** nd 'Life begins when ENVY of, replaces Gratitude for, the likes of Jesus, Newtown teachers.... ONLY then.'  Loving

nd 'In my remaining time, the Can. Emb. Vigil, and Channeling Jesus, King, Gandhi... et al, are my priorities.' Loving

nd 'In my remaining time, the Can. Emb. Vigil, and Channeling Jesus, King, Gandhi... et al, are my priorities.'  Loving

Must Read: TIME interview Pr. Obama

here.

TIME: Runner-Up: Malala Yousafzai

Runner-Up: Malala Yousafzai

nd 'We've tried "reasonable," forever. How's is workin for ya?" Loving

nd 'We've tried "reasonable," forever.  How's is workin for ya?"  Loving

YES!!! Pr. Obama Named Time's Person of the Year. ABC News

Obama Named Time's Person of the Year

ABC News - ‎1 hour ago‎
From a shortlist that included a Pakistani teenager, the new leader of Egypt and a former president, Barack Obama has for the second time been named Time magazine's person of the year.

Cancer - Chemo? NOW? For me!?!? Out of the question - 12.19.12


Cancer - Chemo?  NOW? For me!?!? Out of the question - 12.19.12

The choice:

1.  This cell in my 204 billion cell body of humanity known as Loving, steps out of the battle to avert perpetual Ecocide in the final weeks in which it can be won ($250 / ton CO2e = $2 wreckage fee per $ of gas, 2X wreckage fee per $ of coal or natural gas electricity).

2.  Accept a certain, roughly 10 year  (3 to 20) shortening of my life by the cancer, and a less than pleasant end.  (6 adults in Newtown, with unbounded Love, and Joy, just raced toward a much less generous deal, for not 204 billion kids, but just 600 kids. Bless their Hearts, eternally.) 

Duh!  WHAT THE HELL WAS I THINKING!?!?!? ROFL! We have hours, days, weeks, maybe months, to avert perpetual, unstoppable Ecocide by Green House Gasses, and I'm thinking about aborting the Canadian Embassy Vigil?!!?!?!  Stepping off the battlefield for 6 months!?!?!?!? INSANITY!  Not gunna happen.  I expect to resume the vigil in DC, 24/7, this Friday, until the $250 / ton CO2e legislation is passed. Then I'll be open to accepting chemo.  :-)   Yes, it will be too late then.  Couldn't matter less.

Here's the authoritative, definitive scientific, technological and economic Bottom Line, for those that care, in a 20 min nutshell; and I know of nowhere else you can find it nearly so succinctly (find the button, lower right, for full screen):



More, from a note to two fellow Unviolent Warriors (Diane Wilson, and another), yesterday morning:

I've within the last hour, prior to reading your email, had a fully unexpected, days earlier than I'd expected, Clarity.  I share it with you, and only you at this point, because it pertains to what you've written below, but I expect to take some number of hours to ponder it deeply, and take one or several avenues I can see to 'Test' it, and see if it is correct, if indeed it is the Creator's, if it is Creation's, our Family's will for me.  But I'm Deeply Pleased, Deeply Pleased at what I now see so far, this Clarity of how I am to proceed, this understanding; while respecting that you, others, most, all... may disagree with me.

I've spent the morning beginning to process what I learned yesterday of my cancer, and the debilitating 6 month treatment that would be required.  Just the 5 or so waking hours since my return at midnight last night from DC to a kind household in Phila, has given me the time, space and place to make great strides toward clarity - including imagining the "ideal" arrangements for 6 months of Chemo that conceivably could be arranged:

1.  Christ House - This could be the 6 months sabbatical I've needed to take myself to the next level of Understanding, that I could then share.

2.  The Unity Health Care "infirmary" I've vaguely heard of down near the Embassy.  If I imagine that it is available, it would give me the off-the-street lodging required by the Hospital, and it would give me a responsible way to accept the chemo - no sense accepting the care and expense, and dying from exposure or germs living on the street.  And, those days I was functional, I could do the vigil, and access to online.

3.  Three households in suburban Philly area that would Love to have me thru the chemo, and I'd have at least full access to fight via the internet.  The Medicaid maybe/probably from DC wouldn't be transferable, but I can imagine for now that it could;  update - I have just gotten off the phone with one of the Philly prospective hospitals and they suspect it could be arranged.

So I can now today "see" the ideal circumstances for chemo treatment.

The Blessed Clarity that has come to me, after seeing these options to which I was blind yesterday, the clarity is - it is impossible to abandon the vigil at this time.  If our next 204 billion are to be saved it will be in Loving, all out, nothing held back, Unviolent Battle by every one of us possible, NOW, not 7 months from now. 

Due to the unimaginable kindness and goodness of my medical care up until now (Doc Cardile at Unity, Christ House, Howard U) I've been given months more ability to contribute, NOW.  THANK YOU!  I'm currently still healing, yet I'm in practically no pain, for the first time in a year. I have little reason to believe that in the next 3-9 months I'll have symptoms cropping up that will impair my ability to contribute just as I have from the vigil, online, etc; and maybe my ability to contribute will be 2 or three times that long.  I've healed rapidly from the Nov 30th surgery.  I was physically prepared, if barely, to resume the vigil last night, but the treatment facts given me yesterday - 2 tumors, not one, pretty aggressive cancer, of needing 6 MONTHS debilitating chemo, for starters, life expectancy by 5 years of 50-60%... just was so massively new for me I needed space to ponder, and hence the retreat to Philly.

With immense Joy, my guess is that as soon as Friday, now that my feet are back on the ground, I'll give notice that I will forgo the chemo, and resume the DC vigil immediately.  LOL - For a day, or several weeks, the arrangements for my Beloved Pr. Obama's inauguration may force me away from Penn Ave, his route, back to Phila, for a few days or weeks, but that is no matter.

This is no time for chemo.  This is the time when we win, or lose, for our 204 billion kids.  There is no July 2012.  There's only... NOW.

I'm quite sure of all this for me now, but I'll continue for some hours to deeply ponder and Test this.

I'll continue to keep you both posted.

Loving

12.18.2012

Huh!?!?!? US demands Iran release hunger-striking human rights lawyer. Reuters

US demands Iran release hunger-striking human rights lawyer
Reuters
WASHINGTON (Reuters) - The United States on Friday demanded that Iran free jailed human rights activist Nasrin Sotoudeh, who it said has been on hunger strike for more than six weeks, and sharply criticized Iranian authorities for their treatment of ...

nd 'The only thing to be sad about: To not spend your Life on our Global Neediest.' Loving

nd 'The only thing to be sad about: To not spend your Life on our Global Neediest.' Loving

Hunger-Striking Prisoners at Risk of Imminent Death. Palestine News Network

Hunger-Striking Prisoners at Risk of Imminent Death
Palestine News Network
Thursday 6th December, Addameer Prisoner Support and Human Rights Association expresses its deep concern for the health and lives of five Palestinian political prisoners that are on hunger strike to protest their unjust detention in Israeli Occupation ...

A Victorious Hunger Strike. Daily Beast

A Victorious Hunger Strike
Daily Beast
For 49 days, jailed Iranian human-rights lawyer Nasrin Sotoudeh went on a life-threatening hunger strike. Her goal: to force Iranian authorities to stop harassing her family and remove a travel ban on her 12-year-old daughter. Drinking nothing but

Attawapiskat chief plans hunger strike to force Harper meeting. CBC.ca

Attawapiskat chief plans hunger strike to force Harper meeting
CBC.ca
The chief of the First Nations community of Attawapiskat in northern Ontario says she is willing to go on a hunger strike and risk her own health to push the Canadian government to meet treaty obligations. “We need to have a better dialogue,” Theresa

***** D Wilson & Friend, Day 20 or so Hunger Strike: MORE

Keystone Pipeline Blockade Update: 80 Days In Trees, Hunger Strikes, And An Army General Speaking Out

Egypt protestors stage hunger strike till Mursi steps down. euronews

Egypt protestors stage hunger strike
euronews
A small group of protestors have decided to stage a hunger strike against President Mursi and have vowed not to eat until he steps down. The demonstrators, who are camping outside Cairo's presidential palace, say the president has lost legitimacy. The

US Postal workers stage second hunger strike as House-Senate talks on legislation ... Washington Post

Postal workers stage second hunger strike as House-Senate talks on legislation ...
Washington Post (blog)
As Senate-House negotiations continue for a possible year-end deal to help the financially struggling U.S. Postal Service, a small band of protesters plan to launch their second hunger strike in six months on Tuesday. The six former and current postal ...

***** "I Love you All..." Newtown 1st Grade Teacher to Save her Kids

New York Daily News

TIME: After Newtown, How Can Schools Be Safer?

After Newtown, How Can Schools Be Safer?

also:  

http://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nation/2012/12/17/newtown-connecticut-victims-pictures/1774689/ 

Victims' families share photos of Obama's Newtown visit

***** URGENT: 'Regarding Evil, Jesus is fundamentally mis-understood.' Loving.

 Bottom Line:

The key strategic import, for the Unviolent Warrior, by whatever name is:  Clearly conceive, construct, and carry out any and every "action" against evil, EXPLICITLY as Delivering Love, usually brutally Tough, to the Target.  Will doing so radically and obviously change the characteristics and apparent nature of all actions?  No, not "obviously."  But Fundamentally.  Is it "obvious" a bomb carrying a nuclear device, vs one that carries something else?  Not to me.  But it is fundamentally different in Truth and impact, none the less.

Were I to do another Hunger Strike, I would need to understand it as explicitly as I could as a delivery of Love to the target.  I don't think I've ever thought of it in that way.  If I did so, that would directly alter everything, including my Communication, Spirit, interactions, intended targets.... and I'm Certain it would make any future Hunger Strikes of Vastly more promise.

For now, I probably can't be more clear, or specific, tho I'll keep trying.  :-)

Continuing...

The following may be obvious for years, to you, but it is massively new, Transformative Clarity, to me.

Through the undeserved Grace of the Creator, the Forces of Creation, my inklings of how to defeat Evil, so called nonviolence, what better is called Unviolent Warfare, Waging Love... has taken a fundamental leap for me in recent weeks, the greatest leap in maybe a decade, despite my daily practice and study of the issue all that time.

Surely Gandhi is the father of what the best understand as any worthwhile ideas of unviolent warfare these last 70 years or so.  Many don't know who Gandhi's primary source of wisdom, Teaching, was.  Jesus, by all accounts, as Jesus was discovered to Gandhi by the writings of Leo Tolstoy - "The Kingdom of God is Within You," in particular, and then many years of personal correspondence with Tolstoy, who Gandhi considered the greatest living example of Nonviolence (Unviolent Warfare).

Well, much of the time I had when able to focus during the recent 2 weeks of recovery from surgery has been a re-immersion in those same Tolstoy writings that created Gandhi.

Frankly, what I learned through this most recent re-study of these Tolstoy writings is NOT what Tolstoy concluded about Jesus teaching.  I'm certain that Tolstoy got it wrong, or rather, that he understandably, did not take what he saw through all the way to it's correct end.  I say this by way of full disclosure, and so as not to lay at Tolstoy's feet the following.  I do not say this to diminish Tolstoy's writings on Jesus, writings that I consider to be the most important works yet available to man - that if deeply understood by thousands, or millions, would more than anything else I can see, Save humanity from the Ecocide and/or larger Technocice that is otherwise in the final stages of dooming all future humans to Earth as Living Hell.  ("The Kingdom of God is Within You," "The Gospel in Brief,"  "The Law of Love and the Law of Violence," these three in particular."

What Tolstoy seems to say as Jesus most central and important point of all, of everything he taught and lived is that - The #1 Path to Humanity, Goodness, Personal Joy, Collective Heaven on Earth... the true, concrete victory over Evil is - DO NOT RESIST EVIL.

As far as it goes, this is patently wrong, incorrect, absurd, WRONG.  And let me be clear again, I view Tolstoy as probably the most important intellect for Humanity since Jesus himself.

The shooter in Newtown should not have been stopped?  Should not have been resisted?  OBVIOUSLY, "Do not resist evil" is NOT what Jesus meant.  OBVIOUSLY.  Even in Tolstoy's writing:
*  Jesus fashioned a whip and drove the money changers from the temple.
*  Told the Apostles to secure swords, tho immediately admonished Peter for using one.
*  Interposed himself, opposing the evil of those that would have stoned the woman....



And Gandhi's actions, based on Tolstoy's rendering's of Jesus' teachings, too, imply a perception that on it's face Tolstoy, and today's so called proponents of "non-violence" (willful "cowards" in my view, as I've written)... got it totally wrong.

Clearly what Jesus taught was NOT - Do not resist Evil - but rather -

A.  RESIST EVIL!!! OF COURSE!!!! HOWEVER, DO NOT RESIST EVIL... NEVER, NEVER, NEVER...WITH EVIL!!!!!! DO NOT RETURN, DO NOT RETURN, DO NOT RETURN... Evil for Evil!!!!!!!!!!!!! AND FURTHER -
B.  RETURN GOOD, RETURN GOOD, RETURN GOOD... FOR EVIL; WHEN EVIL IS DONE TO YOU YOU, OR TO ANY OF OUR GLOBAL NEEDIEST FAMILY, OR TO ANYONE, OR TO ANY OF CREATION !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
This is what Jesus meant, and demonstrated throughout his life; and so with Gandhi, Diane Wilson, Rachel Corrie, MLK Jr....  AND THE FIRST RESPONDERS IN NEWTOWN!!!!!  Huh, most would say!  They used Violence!  NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  Violence is that which VIOLATES the Good, what is Right, Loving.  YES, had the first responders acted out of Hate, intending do the Evil of Harming.... But no reports indicate this!  They were putting their own Lives in the way, for GOOD.  If I had been the crazed Lanza, SHOOT ME!  For Good's sake, STOP ME!  For LOVING's SAKE, SHOOT ME.  PLEASE!!!!!!  Right?????  BUT OUT OF LOVE, COMPASSION, UNDERSTANDING... INCLUDING FOR ME AS LANZA, THE CRAZED KILLER!....

Despite a lifetime, and most intensely, more than a decade now of single-minded study and practice of Unviolent Warfare, I didn't see this until just 2 weeks go, deeply pondering Tolstoy's writing.  This opens up huge avenues for me to refine approaches that I've taken, or considered; but now refined with what I can imagine will be Geometrically more hopeful prospects of success, than anything I've yet understood!!!!

This is the stuff of ALL, ALL, ALL... Unviolent, Nonviolent Actions:  LOVING BOMBS.  CARPET BOMBING WITH WEAPONS, WITH RESPONSES, OF 'TOUGH,' OR NOT-TOUGH LOVING, AS THE SITUATION DEMANDS.  PERIOD.  PERIOD.  PERIOD.  (Think cancelling out anti-matter with a sufficient amount of matter!)

Of course there is no expectation that any one such 'Loving Bomb' will suffice.  Duh.  But that it is vastly more the correct type of, characteristic of weapon, of response, of action than I've yet understood to become, to deliver... YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Now, Jesus Gospel is this, His Teaching is this as I've recently shared - ***** vlog 'May I Teach You Jesus' Gospel? I 'get it' now.' Loving.  Of the two categories of Spirit (psycholgically, neurologically speaking) within us, the Spirit of Loving is our True, DNA intended, Spirit to be dominant, ALWAYS, EVERY SECOND, over the alternative Spirit of Flesh (Selfishness); purely for reasons of optimal capacity, optimal adaptivity for the individual, and optimal adaptivity for the species, under EVERY, EVERY... circumstance; every breath, every second.  Silly?  This is just EXACTLY to say that in every instance, every breath, every second it is more adaptive, more advantageous for:
 *  Sanity (Loving) to Reign over Insanity (Loving being Clinical Sanity; Selfishness being Clinical Insanity - anti-social characteristics, even if our societal norms don't so say).
*  Maximal INTELLIGENCE (Heart) to Reign over lower intelligence (Flesh/Head).
*  Maximal VISION, INCLUSIVENESS of VISION (Loving, Solidarity, Brotherhood, Compassion, Understanding) to Reign over Narrowness of Vision (Animosity, Hatred, Ignorance of, Divorce from, Lack-of-Understanding of).

This new understanding will inform all of my future planning and actions; as I hope it has, and does, yours.

Pre-Emptive, and Re-active LOVING - Waging the Toughest Imaginable, most Relentless, NEVER Ceasing War of Loving against all evil, against EVERY evil act, EVERY evil circumstance, for the INFINITE JOY and HOPE of it, and for the certain, absolute Victory that only such weapons can and would bring.


Cancer Update - Searching for advice, for a way forward 12.18.12

[To: 

Doc C., Unity Health Care;
P. G., Patient Advocate at Howard Cancer Center;
M., nurse Practitioner Christ House -

Angels in Residence all three]

Dear, dear, dear Friends,

I am totally fine, in every way, well, except the cancer, which itself doesn't concern me much.  I was going to resume my 24 hour per day vigil, in the rain, to avert global ecocide, in front of the Canadian Embassy last night, but I was so knocked off balance by what I learned from cancer doc M. at Howard yesterday that I instead returned to a friends house in Philadelphia where I could have a roof over my head and try to get my bearings and figure out how to move forward.  Yes, sadly, I'm more of a wimp than I wish I were.  But, there it is.

BTW, what I understand from the cancer meeting yesterday is at the end of this email, below.

Expecting to hear 6 WEEKS of chemo, '6 MONTHS, for STARTERS' is what I learned.  Big deal?  This is why it seems to be a big deal for me.  As with my dad before me, I experience that the reason to be alive, and the WAY to be alive, is to Serve our Global Neediest, 7 days a week, every waking moment, and this I've done with ever increasing Joy throughout my life as best I've known to do; and in recent decade "sacrificing" virtually everything material we value in this society so I could serve the populations I was called to serve in the ways they seemed to need from me.  Finally, according to each of the 3500 global phd climate scientists, we have weeks, not years, to finally implement a 6% reduction of fossil fuel emissions, beginning 2013, or rapidly unfolding ecocide will be impossible to ever avert; or at best, averting it will utterly destitute, financially enslave each of the next 200 billion kids born on earth as they try to survive a planet we've near totally destroyed, and turned against them.  2013 is the most pivotal year in human history, and I'm going to be TOTALLY taken out of the fight, for half of it?  This is incomprehensible for me.

So, being homeless, in DC, THANK GOD Christ House, worthy of the name, seems willing to take me in for the 6 months chemo.  But they are necessarily a massively restrictive environment because a large portion of their clients are recovering addicts.  Hence I'd be facing 6 months of total removal from my work - zero internet, zero outside communication, zero ability to study, write, publish - no computer, no online.  And my BODY says YES, go there, the care for my body would be perfect.  But my Spirit says nooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!  You must be able to work, those days when you are able!

That's the problem. 

Can you advise me?  If you know of any of the following, or pointers for me to follow up on, please let me know?

1.  Is there a suitable, but less restrictive environment in DC where I'd have a roof over my head, but the ability to be on-line, at least, those days that my body was able?  And maybe even free to move about the city when my body was able; sort of, as any of you would do, that God forbid you were in my shoes? I mean, people that have homes, they continue to work, many of them I'm learning, when they go through chemo, just missing some days when the fatigue is too much.

2.  Would getting care, including Medicaid, in the Philadelphia area be out of the question?  I have friend here that would probably be happy to have me with them the 6 months.  I'd be removed from DC, but at least I'd be able to work online.   Any ideas on how I could see if this is possible, and make arrangements?

Thank you friends for all you've done for me.

Any and all reply you can give me will be immensely helpful.  Answers?  Pointers?  Any clarity at all?

Loving u all, no matter what

CANCER MEETING WITH DOC M. AT HOWARD:

*  2 tumors, not one, were found.
*  Pathology report reveals that the larger tumor was fairly advanced, had been around for quite some time, and probably has been spreading it's off-spring around my body.
*  The spot on my liver is quite large, and concerns them.  They don't know what it is and have ordered a PET scan for me in early January.
*  They've also ordered a brain scan and that's scheduled now for Jan 12th at Howard, as I recall. 
*  I'm scheduled to meet with Doc M. Jan 15th to review test results and begin final arrangements for the chemo.
*  She spoke of a 6 months regimen - 2 week intervals, come in, get chemo, wear a pump for 2 days, get the pump removed, come back in 2 weeks, repeat....
*  If I accept the 6 month treatment my likelihood of survival is 50-60% after 5 years, and if I were to make it past that point, the likelihood is I'd survive quite a few more years as well.
*  If I refuse the treatment, so I can keep fighting in these most crucial of all weeks and months, presumably my odds of surviving and working even 5 more years goes down pretty dramatically.  Wish I had more clarity on this.

12.17.2012

Victims' families share photos of Obama's Newtown visit USA TODAY

Victims' families share photos of Obama's Newtown visit

USA TODAY - ‎8 hours ago‎
The White House has not released official photos of President Obama's visit with Newtown, Conn., families Sunday, but several pictures have been posted on social media.

Cancer - I'm a bit in shock. Need some help. I'm OK. 12.17.12

It's not what a thought - 6 weeks chemo.

It's 6 MMMOOONNNNTTTTHHHHSSSS chemo, for starters?

Mid to somewhat advanced were the tumors they removed.  Two, not one were found, one quite large and advanced.

Large is the spot on my liver.

6 MONTHS???? God bless Christ House - I know they'd take me, but I'd be dead there - Work, Serving is Life - and I'd be prevented for 6 months?

If I get the chemo - 50-60% survival expectancy by 5 years.

I want to try to get back to Philly tonight late so I can think.

More later.

12.16.2012

INDISPENSIBLE MEDIA: IN THE WAKE OF NEWTOWN, AND EVERY DAY. MSNBC

THIS MEDIA IS A GODSEND.

MSNBC DAILY.

BOOK MARK IT.  WATCH IT DAILY.  DAILY.  DAILY.  DAILY.

IN MY LIFETIME I'VE NEVER SEEN THE LIKE.

NOTE ALL, ALL, ALLLLLL OF THE PROGRAMS.

'Up' with Chris Hayes, and MHP (Melissa Harris Perry) are the two Sat and Sun 2 hr programs.

All these programs are free online, posted within 2 hours of airing.

For God's sake, use these, as I have, to return to my Citizenship.

DEMOCRACY IS NOT, NOT, NOT... A SPECTATOR SPORT.  DICTATORSHIP, FASCISM ARE.

OH GOD. Newtown school shooting Remembering the victims. WashPo

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-srv/special/nation/newtown-school-shooting-victims/?tid=ts_carousel

**** Meet Scott, a young Christ-like, by Whatever Creed



Scott Montgomery was raised in southwest Virginia and was privileged to have access to a fine education and an environment which instilled the value of a strong work ethic. By having great mentors such as his teachers, athletic coaches, Boy Scout leaders, and family members he had already acquired many values needed to succeed in what they each expected he should want to achieve. In his last year of high school he learned a lesson of mortality when his grandmother’s life was cut short after a routine medical operation. He drove the family to Florida the next night and at the funeral (with little understanding) he promised that would make her proud.
In college he began to learn how to operate outside of a comfort zone, until during his second year he learned that he had the digestive disease, Crohns-Colitis. He was told he would have to take medicines in order to live with it from that day forward. He learned during the rest of his studies in accounting at Longwood University lessons of struggle, enduring, and even dollar value retail method LIFO. He was able to graduate having only missed one week of class during a hospital stay.
Upon graduating he began studying for the CPA exam and was well for a few months. This was due to now taking a drug called Remicade in an intravenous form each month. Six months after graduation he had completed one of four parts to the CPA exam, but became ill again. By the end of February, he was in worse health than ever, receiving recommendations to have his colon removed, and was 90% of the time reserved to his childhood home. Before visiting a specialist at the University of North Carolina, he had begun changing his diet and overall lifestyle after learning of individuals healing without the use of medication.  After discussing his plan with the specialist, he was told that he would return “even sicker” than his current condition of making trips to the bathroom every hour of each day.
Scott spent two days completely relearning everything he thought he knew about food and began a plan to become well. By then he had exposed a flaw in the common knowledge of Crohn’s disease and no longer accepted that the cause was a design flaw within his body. He had acquired faith that it was an absurd idea that he was put here to suffer. Therefore he would one day be healthy again if he respects and listens to his body. By the end of the summer after nearly six grueling months he was beginning to live a normal life and he began studying again.
After this experience and with the help of some new role models, he began to realize what he had learned over the past six months. These role models had learned what he was starting to learn, that the goals and aspirations which he was exposed to until now were goals that are unlikely to satisfy even the dullest of individuals. How many celebrities have found no happiness in satisfying all of their material wants and desires?
Unlike his prior role models (who he still uphold as fine persons who have many things to be proud of) their focus was how to reach true happiness and improve the lives of others, most importantly the ‘least’ of these persons. (greatest need)
After finishing the CPA exam he applied for a few jobs with little enthusiasm, but also one which appeared to be everything he was looking for and even within two hours of his hometown. Within four days of sending his cover letter and resume, he was working as an accountant with Kissito Healthcare and Kissito Healthcare International. KHI at the time was supporting a government health center in East Uganda and also in process of constructing a hospital in rural Ethiopia. Scott was excited to travel overseas. Due to having many wide responsibilities at Kissito, as well as a demanding accounting position, he was unable to travel during his first one year with Kissito.
In September, Scott was offered the position which he had originally applied for, with a change of being stationed permanently in East Africa. The timing was perfect, and he immediately began winding up his affairs and packing to leave in one month. Over the past year, he had learned many skills and facets to managing all the support functions of a nonprofit. This opportunity would now teach him the challenges and skills required to accomplish goals of sustainably improving the lives of others. He was now reassured that he was on the right path, by fate or chance he was saved of a life of pleasure with no purpose. Alternatively he became aware of an alternative filled with immense and nearly unbearable challenges, but also with the opportunity to live a valuable life.
Scott is now working in Mbale, Uganda with Kissito as an accountant as well as completing some small projects in his spare time. He is currently investigating what areas to greatest serve those with the greatest on the planet. He is also considering enrolling in a Master’s of Public Health course through either an African college or online.  He is currently setting up a website and planning fundraisers for a vehicle to both research projects for the long-term as well as complete short-term projects during his employment with Kissito Healthcare. If you wish to volunteer, assist financially, or simply join his mailing list, please email: scott.montgomery at roots-international dot org.

SHARE: Talking Points for Children re Newtown Massacre - Na. Assoc. Schl. Psych.

Our sister Cathy, lifelong elementary school educator, forwarded this.  Read.  Share.

http://s3.amazonaws.com/dfc_attachments/public/documents/3168494/talkingviolenceNASP.pdf

Cancer Update - I Expect to Resume DC Vigil Tomorrow Night - 12.16.12

My body really hates the plan, but the Spirit of Christ, Loving, within me, is winning out it seems.  I Pray so.

My Body craves more time to recover, but it is not necessary for my body, and what is necessary is getting back to fight against the one-sided genocidal war against irreversible Ecocide, stopping my abandonment of Diane Wilson and the few others fighting for your children and grandchildren's future for you; for the Joy, Love, Life and peace of Heart of it.

The incision is still draining.  The entire abdominal area feels extremely vulnerable physically, which it is.  The Bowel remains unstable.  But all of this should be quite manageable after these 14 days or so of healing, back on the street in front of the Canadian Embassy.

Tomorrow at 1pm is the 1st meeting with the cancer doc, in DC.  I expect to be told I'll need 6 weeks of chemo beginning mid-January.  If so, to my surprise, I expect to accept.  If they will allow it, I'll endure the chemo while maintaining the vigil.  I've been told however that they will not perform the chemo unless I'm at a place like Christ House, because the immune system gets so compromised.  My current guess is that the right choice between between:

A.  Reject any further delay or disruption of the vigil in front of the Canadian Embassy, my part of the fight against permanent Ecocide, rejecting the 1.5 months for chemo, thereby shortening my years of service physically here on earth by some number years, presumably.  I have no aversion to this.  My only concern is that I use every breath to do the most possible Good.

B.  Accept the chemo, trading a 1.5 month delay in my Warring, Waging Love, in favor of the possibility of years more to Serve, years more to Live, each Breath, for our Global Neediest Family members.

My current thinking is that despite the Unassailable Truth that every HOUR, every MINUTE NOW is more crucial than at any other time in history with the possible exception of the Cuban Missile Crisis, crucial to avert Global Ecocide by Green House Gasses, my efforts are so invisible, amongst the swarm of we 300 million Affloholics, that I best serve our Global Neediest by accepting the delay, for the chemo.

I'll continue to seek the mind of the Creator, in my Heart (as must you, every breath), but this is what I am Hearing thus far.


'SNL' & Newtown Shooting: Show Opened With 'Silent Night' Tribute

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/12/16/snl-newtown-shooting-show-silent-night_n_2310589.html

***** nd 'Christ-ian's North Star: Our Global Neediest. EVERY BREATH. EVERY BREATH.' Loving

nd 'Christ-ian's North Star: Our Global Neediest. EVERY BREATH. EVERY BREATH.' Loving