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My most personal Thoughts: sloving
(Start Loving, the pka for James McGinley)

The most crucial posts: *****

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EFLIUS (Exploring For Life In US): here

3.09.2016

***** To reformulate slightly something that I've seen and admired on Facebook recently, and to encapsulate everything that I know and believe, if you want to be joyful and have less suffering in your life, devote.......

***** To reformulate slightly something that I've seen and admired on Facebook recently, and to encapsulate everything that I know and believe, if you want to be joyful and have less suffering in your life, devote your life to helping the neediest be more joyful, and have less suffering in their lives. That's what I live for well over a decade now and having tried everything else that Society has to offer that Path is the Holy Grail.

Although it may well appear the opposite, joyful is how I would categorize my every breath. Agonized but joyful. I envy no one on earth or in history their quality of life.

Although it may well appear the opposite, joyful is how I would categorize my every breath. Agonized but joyful. I envy no one on earth or in history their quality of life.

To the Liberals constantly disparaging, attacking, belittling, taunting the uneducated, ignorant Americans, stop it!!! Do you taunt.......

To the Liberals constantly disparaging, attacking, belittling, taunting the uneducated, ignorant Americans, stop it!!! Do you taunt people who are physically crippled? Not in public you don't. And you attacked those who do. The white, uninformed, uneducated people that you constantly disparage have been systematically and deliberately crippled intellectually and informationally by the rulers. They are in revolt against you and you deserve it. Figure out how to help them, how to make up for your years of neglect and bigotry, and stop attacking them.

***** Sanders is no better an individual in my view, and less capable by far, then President Obama. We saw how much difference it makes who the president is, very very little, unless.....

***** Sanders is no better an individual in my view, and less capable by far, then President Obama. We saw how much difference it makes who the president is, very very little, unless the citizenry remains militantly and totally committed on the stage every day along side of that individual for as long as they are in office. And we totally completely 100% failed to do this as Citizens for all eight years that President Obama was in office. One of the things I love about Sanders, and I did about Obama too, is they are very explicit about this. We ignored Obama in this obvious truth. If we elect Sanders, and we continue to ignore this obvious truth, on my god do we deserve what we get.

I don't think it's the money with Hilary, I think it's being a member of the club, finally. She was born outside the club of the financial Elites. And her pitiful little ego, she will do anything to anybody to remain in that club now. I think that's entirely what she is about. Pleasing the Masters. Remaining a member of the club.

I don't think it's the money with Hilary, I think it's being a member of the club, finally. She was born outside the club of the financial Elites. And her pitiful little ego, she will do anything to anybody to remain in that club now. I think that's entirely what she is about. Pleasing the Masters. Remaining a member of the club.

***** I seem to be undergoing a sea change........

I seem to be undergoing a sea change.

Shame on any who saw the error of my ways, or the oversight, and did not tell me.

Beginning October last year I shifted from 100% focus on renewable energy, to 0% focus on renewable energy, stopping global warming, on the basis that fighting to save a civilization, a species, Humanity, that is so Savage that they sit by while a genocide in Palestine goes into the year 70, well, my loyalty to that species was gone and I was not going to fight to save it.

More recently my admiration, my love, for Bernie Sanders, has probably been all too clear from my postings, but I've also been clear that I would not and could not vote for him unless and until he came out unequivocally against the genocide in Palestine.

Well, I seem to be undergoing a sea change. Here is what I mean. Since October of last year I have been fighting for the Palestinian part of my family to have basic human rights, despite the fact that I realized I was totally failing, that anyone fighting this is failing. All of the money and all the weapons in the world are on the side of the u.s. Israeli extermination land grab of Palestine. But I figured that my fighting was something I needed to do anyway, and I figured that in some way I might be slightly reducing the amount of suffering that these victims must endure.

The sea change is that I now see environmental work, and voting for Bernie Sanders in that same light. Yes, my loyalty to a species that perpetrates this Palestinian genocide is gone. But not my loyalty to the victims, that is not gone. My loyalty to the victims of our Criminal Savage Beastial use of fossil fuels is not gone. And the election of Bernie Sanders slows down the global warming machine and the other ways that the u.s. Empire corporate fascist machine tortures torments terrorizes and terminates the needy in this country, and Palestine, and around the world. Even any and all work if otherwise doomed to fail 2 attempt to get president Sanders elected has that benefit because it is education to the country and to the world of the type of world we should have.

Like I say, a sea change. Exactly how it will manifest I'm not sure but in my work, manifest, it will.

3.08.2016

***** I have reached, and implemented, a final decision regarding my housing.Never in any way did.....

***** I have reached, and implemented, a final decision regarding my housing.
Never in any way did I attempt to drag out this process and it was to my total shock and amazement that day after day, week after week, month after month the housing system never was in a position to finalize the offer  they originally told me of back in November. Consequently, my decision to refuse the housing to stay in what I considered best lived solidarity with the least of these my sisters and brothers, I expected to be long executed and past in early December.
Only last week was the housing system in a position to do so at which point I stated my major outstanding question, could I liberally use this one bedroom apartment to help in particular my friend who has Ms? And by Wednesday of last week the answer came back, we regret to say, no that is not possible.
Well, that precipitated another couple of days of hemming and hawing on the part of my nervous system but within a couple of days I had, crystal clear, of course I will turn down the property so that every penny I have can continue to go to Palestine and other causes related to the abused poorest among us. Yes, my nervous system was clear, I have physical desires for a permanent place of my own, but those desires are just infinitely far down the list of my desires compared to my desires for A life of less horror and suffering for my children in Palestine and elsewhere.
But on Saturday I think it was in reviewing my second cause, beside Palestine, fighting against the war on the American poor, I was reviewing articles on gentrification and it hit me pretty hard that 1. Unless I accepted the property it could be fairly rapidly that I would be driven out of the city with the rest of the poor either through increased prices, criminalisation of the poor, and therefore imprisonment. If I thought this was the best way to serve I would do it in a heartbeat. But I think it is not the best way for me to serve, at least not at this point in time. The future could be different. 2. A second thought occurred to me for the first time, that this was not a lifetime decision, but a one year by one year venture. And finally, the clincher, 3. This would shift my vantage point and point of attack and that for a year that could be very useful to giving me new perspectives on my work and allowing me as a propertied resident of the city to work with various social, city, and civic organizations in ways that I am NOT allowed to as a homeless person. And after a year of getting my foot in the door as a propertied citizen, I been could return to homelessness but my foot is still in the door. Lol. This last one is a bit clandestine, which I rarely rarely allow myself, but in this case I am.
Yesterday I got the cashiers checks and secured the apartment, I'll take much of this week to transition out of the homeless shelter, but last night I slept on the floor of the apartment and now am doing laundry in the beautiful large laundry facility of this extremely nice building. A building, by the way, I'm happy to report, I am one of the only white faces. I wouldn't have it any other way.
This is in northeast DC in a rapidly gentrifying area, Brookland. I had not realized it was rapidly gentrifying but only this morning out for coffee it hit me in the face. Hugely, rapidly, gentrifying.     Today's vicious colonialism.
Already  my decision regarding the apartment is opening up a new perspective for me that there are a host of potential advantages to my being here this year, from accelerating my learning curve, to giving me a practical pragmatic foothold, in making some of my focus this particular community, maybe even this largely African American senior subsidized housing facility. Today, for example, for that reason, I may attend a meeting that I see for a community garden.
Or, I may skip that meeting for a1 o'clock meeting down at DC City Hall on Housing and gentrification.
I don't remember exactly but I think my apartment building, 635 Edgewood Street, 20017, apartment 525, it's about a two and a half three mile ride from the edge of the city itself, Union Station, on what appears to be a ridiculously safe, I rode it at 9 o'clock last night, bike path put in place exactly so that the previously lower middle class African American, undesirable, part of the city could be gentrified, colonized, taken over, by young white, elite, highly educated, over-privileged, urban professionals.
It will be interesting to see if I become just another white colonial over-privileged gentrifying cancer cell in the body of dc humanity, inhumanity, or if I become a healthy cell, an agent for a more humane process.
No, I expect to have virtually no impact, but it still will be true that I will be either a healthy cell, or, the only other option, a cancer cell. Of course, the only choice I see that has joy to it is to be of the type, healthy. But I live in the imperial city of hunger games, Dc, which is one massive temptation to become cancerous, self centered, self-serving, selfiish, detached, blissfully oblivious, to the needy that we trample through our selfishness. We don't intentionally trample the neediest. We choose selfishness and the result is the we trample the neediest, to depression, desperation, and death.
You know what occurred to me yesterday for the first time in my life? Probably 16/17 years ago as I was leaving the realm of being  intensive malignant colonial elitist cancer as an executive in high tech, in my intensive study I spent a lot of time studying Teresa of Calcutta because her books more than any other are filled with the word joy, literally, which I suspected, joy, was the true north of being a healthy human being. Everyday since, has proven that that was a correct perception. And further I was studying, and life every breath teaches me is correct, that joy is the fruit of loving,  and only the fruit of loving.
Well, it was in reading  a book written by Teresa of Calcutta that for the first time in my life I saw a word associated with a piece of Scripture that had always been sacred to me, ultimately sacred, do unto others as you would have them do unto you. The word that I saw in the scripture for the very first time, in a book by Teresa, was the word all. Do unto others all, all, all, that you would have them do unto you. This was a lightning bolt to me. duh!!!! Do unto others all, all, all, all, all, all.....
So that was the translation of that scripture that I read in Teresa of Calcutta's book.
The revelation for me yesterday, after the last 17 years of studying and practicing militant Loving, what hit me for the very first time, lol, was that the definition of Loving is, do unto others all, all, ALL... that you would have them do unto you. Is there a more perfect, is there a definition as perfect, of Loving, than, do unto others all that you would have them do unto you?
Actually, I think there is. The quintessential definition of Loving requires inserting a gene slice from another part of Jesus DNA teaching, namely, least of these.
The perfect definition of Loving, as opposed to lusting which is near always what we mean by Loving, the perfect definition of Loving is: do unto the least of these all that you would have them do unto you. Hello! Am I the last one to make this connection??????

3.06.2016

Friends, when people provide input on decisions I must make, such as my current Housing Choice, if I do not agree with or act in the direction of that input it.....

Friends, when people provide input on decisions I must make, such as my current Housing Choice, if I do not agree with or act in the direction of that input it does not mean I do not value it, or that I reject it, or that I dismiss it, or that I don't consider it. None of those virtually ever happens with me if someone gives thoughtful, honest input. If I do not comply or agree it is much more likely for reasons such as, I have embraced a value system that is totally contrary to the one that we have been carefully taught, for the best intended reasons, a value system that I embrace and that embraces me that is totally absolutely opposite and contrary to that which we university embrace in this now near dead rapidly dying culture, and a value system that is therefore all but incomprehensible to just about everyone but me. There could be other reasons but that's pretty much it.

If I accept the housing I think that....

If I accept the housing I think that it will enable me to attack things from a different angle and that is an experiment that might be worthwhile for a year. More than an experiment it may help me learn more quickly from a different perspective and achieve things that can benefit my work in the future. I feel very drawn to advocacy for my homeless and poor and abused brothers and sisters here in DC. See, the social services provided in DC tends to be a closed club that you cannot access, that is, you cannot assist with if you are among the homeless. They simply won't let you help. Which is pretty appalling in itself. But that's how it is. If I have housing I think it is possible that I can get a foot in the door, learn the strengths and weaknesses of the different groups and agencies as I can not do as a homeless person, and then a year from now quite possibly move back into homelessness but retain the access, leverage, and understanding I have to help those organizations do a better job than they could otherwise.