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(Start Loving, the pka for James McGinley)

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5.14.2017

Wisconsin Public Radio interviews James

https://wdrt.org/startLoving/

5.05.2017

I travel so that the vehicle and its message of renewable energy and loving and commitment can be seen. So, absurdly, the destination.....

I travel so that the vehicle and its message of renewable energy and loving and commitment can be seen. So, absurdly,  the destination generally doesn't matter. At the moment I am moving in the direction of Flint Michigan and Detroit where I think there may be some serious movements to try and improve the world's. I wish to observe and learn and maybe briefly contribute. I expect to be going south of Chicago on my way. Anyone that knows of safe places along the route for my sleeping bag and or tent, it would be a kindness to let me know.

If we don't stop the murdering monsters Trump then we absolutely deserve them.

If we don't stop the murdering monsters Trump then we absolutely deserve them.

5.04.2017

You must fight evil not because you might win, but because evil must be fought. And you must fight to win.

You must fight evil not because you might win, but because evil must be fought. And you must fight to win.

Local public radio conducted a 30-minute interview and indicated they plan to submit it for National syndication. I have no expectations other......

Local public radio conducted a 30-minute interview and indicated they plan to submit it for National syndication. I have no expectations other than it was an interesting experience. An absolutely glorious encounter with three young people last night who provided a place for my sleeping bag in their home. They were quite a ghast at all my religious iconography. I think they were delighted with the hours we spent talking as was I. One in particular was so pleased with the message and saddened that so many her age will be discouraged by what are understood as Christian symbols, as she was initially. I explained that I can no more dispense with the symbols associated with the man Jesus then I could if I were trying educate the world about physics and had reason to try and dispense with the man Einstein. I told her I would like to because of all the baggage that has been hung on the man. But I think it cannot be done. It was a very helpful dialogue for me.

5.02.2017

Will the left never Tire of talking instead of acting? No, a one day March is not acting. Keeping your body in the way is acting.

Will the left never Tire of talking instead of acting? No, a one day March is not acting. Keeping your body in the way is acting.

Regarding inflaming a Paris police officer: I condemn this with all my might. Violence is not the revolution. Violence just the status quo. I wish for an end to the future rather than a future of more violence. I will work for a future without violence with all of my might. Violence begets violence. Loving begets loving. In violence is just f****** stupid. All of the weapons in the universe are on the side of the opposition. Violence like this gives them the key to use it. Strategic suicide.

http://metro.co.uk/2017/05/01/police-officer-set-on-fire-with-petrol-bomb-during-riots-in-paris-6609586/

5.01.2017

I've been losing it. If you would hold on to your life, you will lose it, my teacher taught. I've been losing it. No, this......

I've been losing it. If you would hold on to your life, you will lose it, my teacher taught. I've been losing it. No, this is absaf****** lutely not about guilt. I'm not interested in guilt. Never have been. I'm interested in gratification, joy in particular. Are we surprised when that piece of human dung Donald Trump wants an extra billion dollars? No! We understand that kind of greed for what it is. Why can't we understand someone who has an insatiable Greed for Joy, for sense of meaning in life , such as I? Exactly as it is maddeningly difficult for me to maintain Peak form, efficiency, output, when I am pedaling the bicycle, or the same when I was the skiing down an expert slope, it is maddening ly difficult to stay on the optimal path for Joy, for sense of meaning in life. In each of these Pursuits there are various mental tricks I've learned, and physical tricks and techniques and ideas etcetera to maintain Peak Performance and Peak gratification. But somehow the nervous system constantly forgets, gets off of the optimal path, distracts itself etcetera. The teaching of Jesus, if you would hold onto your life you will lose it, was not some horrible warning about going to  heaven or hell after this life. It was a psychological truth that when we allow fear and worry and anxiety and selfishness to distract us from attempting to do good, to that degree, we diminish our feeling of joy and meaning in life. Standing Rock was pretty traumatic. The month after was pretty traumatic for me. My body remembers how traumatic the 2-month Sprint across the country in the vehicle was to get to Standing Rock before the first blizzard. Thankfully, I am realizing this  morning that although my joy and gratification have been quite high in recent weeks,  my gratification has been somewhat diminished because I have been trying to hold on to my life. More than I absolutely need to I have been giving in to the unrecognized fear in me of dealing with cold wet weather which can be quite problematic given this bicycle vehicle. Similarly the physical and psychological stress of sleeping in Walmart parking lot wondering if police or vandals will make a target of me. I am grateful to recognize this morning that the fear has been operating in me. I expect to more dangerously and boldly push past these fears in coming days and to be more gratified and effective as a consequence. beginning last week there were unexplained failures in the motor system of the vehicle for the first time. there is a remote chance that I know what the problem is and how to avoid it going forward. Also, I am awaiting delivery tomorrow of an  inexpensive camera attachment that will let me look at a difficult to see wiring area to see if that's the problem. also tomorrow the Canadian outfit from which I bought the electronics should be opened and I hope to hear from   them what explanation they think applies. So with all this I expect to be here with fellow water protectors helping out where and when I can, at least through early Wednesday morning. At that time I expect to resume Eastward travel possibly on a ferry over to Michigan or down south of Chicago to Lansing, Flint, Detroit, and then maybe on through Ohio and part of  Pennsylvania.

Trying to do good is by Design the most intrinsically gratifying thing we can do! Why is it so f****** difficult......

Trying to do good is by Design the most intrinsically gratifying thing we can do! Why is it so f****** difficult to grasp that attempting to live a good life is intrinsically gratifying? We don't question that playing some dumb f****** video game is intrinsically gratifying. We don't question that having some meaningless social dialogue is at least slightly intrinsically gratifying. We don't question that spending countless hours of Our Lives watching television or listening to music is intrinsically gratifying, or that going to endless meaningless movies, or endless meaningless concerts period period period are intrinsically gratifying. But being good? Oh, that must be because we want to go to heaven. That must be because we want to be socially acceptable. That must be because we want to stay out of jail or prison.... Virtue is its own f****** reward. It's what we're designed to do. It is the direction of giving life and surely that is why our genes cause us to propagate so that we will  successfully Advance the course of life. Attempting to be good socially, environmentally, culturally, economically, morally , is the ultimate intrinsic gratification because that's how we're built.

I fight for good because any amount of it is the most beautiful, valuable, important, life-giving thing on earth.

I fight for good because any amount of it is the most beautiful, valuable, important, life-giving thing on earth.

Those who are not in the global 1% Club are viewed as worthless eaters. We are to be made useful slaves or exterminated.

Those who are not in the global 1% Club are viewed as worthless eaters.
We are to be made useful slaves or exterminated.

There is so much animosity between people in Central States and those in coastal States. I think some of it is.....

There is so much animosity between people in Central States and those in coastal States. I think some of it is an understandable, your states are going underwater, it's what you f****** deserve, And our land values will be going up. That has to be some of it.

4.30.2017

I choose a physically difficult and somewhat dangerous path. My body is rarely happy about it. My soul.....

I choose a physically difficult and somewhat dangerous path. My body is rarely happy about it. My soul is so Satisfied with my choice. I was born and raised to the over-privileged path and existed that way for my first 50 years. Point being, I know what material over-privilege feels like, all of the pleasures, all the intoxications. There is little of that in my days now. Among other things I cancelled a beautiful comfortable apartment in Washington DC, six months ago, to the horror of my body, realizing that my soul needed me as close to the front lines standing against the destruction of everything decent for the rest of my days. My body was and is horrified at the choice. My soul wins out and there is never a moment when my nervous system is not glad at the decision that I made. By using literally every breath as best I can see to do to serve the neediest on earth now, and who will be on Earth in the future, among other things I bring out the hatred in some people, but the goodness in many people. Sometimes they directed it toward me and the goodness is very nice to receive. But more than nice to receive it is nice to see. I don't personally receive the beauty of a natural View but I get get great joy from seeing it. Similarly with the beauty that I see in people's kindness which my life path sometimes brings out. It is a natural path that I walk, natural to we humans. Completely unnatural to we who are brought up in this sickest of all cultures. But some of us can claw our way back to this natural path. No credit to me, I have, and I wish for others to do the same.

The Israelis do truly want peace and they have convinced themselves the way to do it is to totally decimate.....

The Israelis do truly want peace and they have convinced themselves the way to do it is to totally decimate everyone beside themselves. The movie Elysium shows this mentality. The financial Elites of the world have been going to school on what Israel does to the Palestinians for a long time. The fruits are unfolding around us all.

Do I believe in Jesus? No, not the white American one. Not the.....

Do I believe in Jesus? No, not the white American one. Not the white European one.
Absolutely yes,
the brown
Palestinian Jew.

If I have enough food for myself and another person, there is a person starving, and I eat all the food myself, is that immoral? It is....

If I have enough food for myself and another person, there is a person starving, and I eat all the food myself, is that immoral? It is immoral. If I have enough food for 10 million people, or enough resources for food for 10 million people, and I spend the resources on me and mine, is that immoral?

4/28. Wow. I'm toast. But I'm also with a handful of water protectors. That's nice. Today was.....

Wow. I'm toast. But I'm also with a handful of water protectors. That's nice. Today was my longest day since renewing this voyage. 68 miles. Almost six hours of peddling. I'm exhausted. All of a sudden the motor started breaking down. Four unexplained failures. By some miracle among the most knowledgeable Electronics guys from standing rock is here where I am. Total surprise. Tomorrow I suspect we'll Dig Inn. I expect to be here for several days and then depart. My guess is East, Flint and Detroit but I'm not sure.

4/28. The Europeans and their descendants were ordained by destiny to rule all of America. They were.... Bury My Heart at Wounded Knee

The Europeans and their descendants were ordained by destiny to rule all of America. They were the dominant race and therefore responsible for the Indians—along with their lands, their forests, and their mineral wealth. Only the New Englanders, who had destroyed or driven out all their Indians, spoke against Manifest Destiny.
In 1850, although none of the Modocs, Mohaves, Paiutes, Shastas, Yumas, or a hundred other lesser-known tribes along the Pacific Coast were consulted on the matter, California became the thirty-first state of the Union. In the mountains of Colorado gold was discovered, and new hordes of prospectors swarmed across the Plains. Two vast new territories were organized, Kansas and Nebraska, encompassing virtually all the country of the Plains tribes. In 1858 Minnesota became a state, its boundaries being extended a hundred miles beyond the 95th meridian, the “permanent Indian frontier.”

4/28. To justify these breaches of the “permanent Indian frontier,” the policy makers in Washington invented Manifest Destiny, a term which lifted land hunger to a lofty plane. Bury My Heart at Wounded Knee

To justify these breaches of the “permanent Indian frontier,” the policy makers in Washington invented Manifest Destiny, a term which lifted land hunger to a lofty plane.

4/28. To the Indians it seemed that these Europeans hated everything in nature—the living forests and their birds and beasts, the grassy glades, the water, the soil, and the air itself. Bury My Heart at Wounded Knee

To the Indians it seemed that these Europeans hated everything in nature—the living forests and their birds and beasts, the grassy glades, the water, the soil, and the air itself.

I've long thought that damage to water was collateral damage of the fossil fuel and chemical Industries. Now....

I've long thought that damage to water was collateral damage of the fossil fuel and chemical Industries. Now I realize that at the very least the bottled water industry, possibly much more profitable than the oil industry, at the very least does not weep when water supplies are destroyed. And if that's true, which it is, then is it possible that they are not supporting policies that destroy natural water supplies? Extremely unlikely.

I can think of just one profession where the requirement is to lie. Christian faith leader. Nearly every seminarian is taught the scholarly truth, that the Bible is riddled with errors. And virtually every one denies this to the world.

I can think of just one profession where the requirement is to lie. Christian faith leader. Nearly every seminarian is taught the scholarly truth, that the Bible is riddled with errors. And virtually every one denies this to the world.

Our problem is not that we haven't convinced the Republicans to stop destroying the country. Our problem is not convincing the Democrats, we....

Our problem is not that we haven't convinced the Republicans to stop destroying the country. Our problem is not convincing the Democrats, we liberals, to get off our f****** asses and devote Our Lives to giving our children a future, or to f****** die, or spend life, in prison making the attempt. (Full disclosure, so far I only face a year in prison for standing Rock.)

4/28. I met an angel last night. I was cold, wet with sweat, in the snow, having spent another 2200 calories that.....

I met an angel last night. I was cold, wet with sweat, in the snow, having spent another 2200 calories that day pedaling. Her email reply had said, you are welcome here. Turns out she's a lifelong cyclist. Weeks touring the country each year. She knows what she's doing. So extremely kind. So generous with her time and attention. So generous with her house. She prepared me a meal. She had turned up the heat in the house so I would be warm. I told her she is wind under our wings.

Corporate CEOs, my sisters and brothers all, are sociopaths, clinically. Sociopaths. There may be no exceptions to this.

Corporate CEOs, my sisters and brothers all, are sociopaths, clinically. Sociopaths. There may be no exceptions to this.

We are born to be angels to one another, no?

We are born to be angels to one another, no?

During my long battle against stage 4 cancer I finally found the path away from much of the misery but....

During my long battle against stage 4 cancer I finally found the path away from much of the misery but it took me a long time to find it and to learn to walk it well. The path? Redirecting my attention, much of it, most of it, to those people in the world in much worse need than I, and doing what I could to advocate for them and help them even if just online. Much of the misery of any disease is that it understandably but needlessly causes us to direct our attention to our self and away from those who are hurting even more.

Churchill, what a extraordinary monster. I was wrong.

https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=10211066950662594&id=1620551416

4/27. As I travel the country my sense is that there is one group whose lives materially are okay, my generation. Why are they okay? Because we looted....

As I travel the country my sense is that there is one group whose lives materially are okay, my generation. Why are they okay? Because we looted things. And we're living off of our looting. Correction, we are existing off of our looting. I wish we would choose living, fighting for our kids and grandkids and their future, I wish we were living instead.

4/26. 50 or 60 miles today. 2500 calories. My legs, knees, are hurting. Same amount tomorrow. And the next day. The cold weather here.....

50 or 60 miles today. 2500 calories. My legs, knees, are hurting. Same amount tomorrow. And the next day. The cold weather here is making things a bit dangerous. Earlier today I was a bit frightened, I was fatigued and wet and it was raining and I didn't manage my body temperature well and got very very cold.  Pics https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=10211061705651472&id=1620551416

4.26.2017

If there were ever one, or several , or a group of people that actively worked to poison others against me, that would be sad, distressing, but okay. A painful blessing even. How so? There.......

If there were ever one, or several , or a group of people that actively worked to poison others against me, that would be sad, distressing, but okay. A painful blessing even. How so? There are very few people at any point in history , and a smaller percentage as each year goes on, that have retained sufficient Humanity to potentially move our species in a positive direction. 100% of these One in a Million are hypersensitive to spot those who would do such poisoning , they would listen, but they would reach their own conclusion. There have been such poisoners against my work and I see some indication that there are now. If, as I hope, no credit to me, I embody a Force for good, it could hardly be otherwise. This seems to be a subject that was much on Kurt vonnegut's mind. It seems it could be the central reason that he wrote Slaughterhouse-Five, to illustrate this phenomenon, using Billy Pilgrim as the means of showing the individual that insanely devoted their life to destroying Billy, Billy being person that was at least good, if not a Force for good. Curiously, one of the articles I listed to as I was traveling today was one looking at the agonizing seemingly endless struggle between Good and Evil in the country of Columbia. It was quite a worthwhile article although I found some issues regarding credibility. But I was particularly informed and enlightened as the author spoke of a particular community that is under special attack by the dark Forces in Colombia because they have simply decided to be good, to be a force of life. That is their crime. That is their sin. That is why 20 of their leaders have been killed so far this year. Simply for being consummately good. In the view of this article they are an ultimate threat because they are simply purely good. Whether or not I am good, those who are in history such as Jesus, Gandhi, King, tend to be assassinated one way or the other.   As my teacher said before me,  I came not to bring peace but to divide with a sword.  Cancer cannot be cured  unless and until  it is divided from,  identified as different than, healthy tissue. https://www.commondreams.org/views/2017/04/18/war-and-peace-and-war

4.21.2017

I travel in the hopes of spreading that which infects me. A love for all of creation, an unwillingness to see it destroyed.

I travel in the hopes of spreading that which infects me. A love for all of creation, an unwillingness to see it destroyed.

Minneapolis st. Paul, what shockingly contrasting Spirits I find here. People......

Minneapolis st. Paul, what shockingly contrasting Spirits I find here. People that are extraordinarily and proudly hateful, unkind, vicious. People that are aggressively kind, ferociously good and pleasant. The most blatant racism that personally I've seen. And other folks of profound inclusiveness.

"My sister was at Standing Rock too, for months, said the young waiter who kindly expressed admiration for my facial tattoos. She is......

"My sister was at Standing Rock too, for months, said the young waiter who kindly expressed admiration for my facial tattoos. She is currently in New York touring with Cheryl Angel, he went on. I explained briefly my mission around the country and he expressed thanks. He's a photographer and hopes I can wait here in town until his shift is over so he can do a portrait. I told him on my I'm on my way to spend the night at the house of a water protector who runs food now to the various camps. Joe Plouff

4.20.2017

Regarding Trump followers: which of us does not spend most of their time trying to get ahead for me and mine? Virtually all of us, right? Which of.....

Regarding Trump followers: which of us does not spend most of their time trying to get ahead for me and mine? Virtually all of us, right? Which of us deep down is really proud with how we're serving Humanity, our fellow person, by doing so? Almost none of us, right? Well the white voters for Trump rightly View that their stock goes up, their power goes up, their Prestige goes up, if not their income, with Trump. Let's be careful about the pot calling the kettle black.

Literally the nicest people I know have screwed me royally over money. 15 years ago I went $20,000 in credit card debt, I have.....

Literally the nicest people I know have screwed me royally over money. 15 years ago I went $20,000 in credit card debt, I have very good credit, to provide a short term loan so that a political refugee here illegally could enroll his worthy son to college. It was a loan that was guaranteed to be repaid within weeks. I've not seen a penny of it nor heard a word. It took me 2 years labor to pay that off. Another person to whom I devoted the better part of my life limb and Treasurer owes me many thousands of dollars and appears to have no thought of paying that. An individual who was the worthiest, most giving soul, that I saw at, worked along side of, supported, at standing rock, appears to have lied, conned me, out of 500 bucks, and much more.  "What I fear is money. Jesus was sold for 30 pieces of silver." Teresa of Calcutta

Upon learning that I am facing a year in prison for refusing to be bullied away from Standing Rock a friend expressed interest in what legal support I might have. My reply: I have......

Upon learning that I am facing a year in prison for refusing to be bullied away from Standing Rock a friend expressed interest in what legal support I might have. My reply: I have a court appointed lawyer so so far she has been totally useless. I don't expect that to change. I'm very disappointed that Grandma Regina who was our leader has shown zero support for, or interest in, those of us who were arrested and charged. She was arrested and not charged. Knowing this now I would have made the same decision then but it does not speak well of her leadership. I do not perceive that I have any qualified legal support, so be it.

If Jesus were to eliminate all but his people in the land of the United States, pretty much all that would be left would be the natives of North and South America.

If Jesus were to eliminate all but his people in the land of the United States, pretty much all that would be left would be the natives of North and South America.

"You will be charged with trespassing, a federal misdemeanor, and you will face five years in prison and a $5,000 fine," I was told in the days leading up to my arrest on February 23rd.......

"You will be charged with trespassing, a federal misdemeanor, and you will face five years in prison and a $5,000 fine," I was told in the days leading up to my arrest on February 23rd at Standing Rock. Had I been told that I was facing the death penalty I don't suspect that would have changed my decision to stay and stand with Grandma Regina, Ogallala Sioux Tribe, on February 23rd, standing for Native American rights, standing for human rights. I don't do cowardice. I don't run from bullying.

4.19.2017

What a day. Hours on the internet and phone trying to find the solution to these odd sized bicycle trailer wheels I needed to replace. Several......

What a day. Hours on the internet and phone trying to find the solution to these odd sized bicycle trailer wheels I needed to replace. Several hours traveling to the bike shop that thought they could help. Serious rain much of the afternoon making traveling a bit hazardous and hypothermic as it so severely reduces visibility. Extraordinary kindness and great expertise at this large family-owned bicycle shop. The owner had done homework online and drove me in his car to another facility where we found tires and wheels that would work. My bill including parts and labor was under $7. He got upset when I objected so I simply accepted the kindness. He and his staff I believe were stirred by the mission, the vehicle, our conversation. I was wet from pedaling in the temperature outside reducing so a bit hypothermic. Presently I am resting in the home of a fellow water protector who reached out to me several days ago and aggressively and kindly offered a place for me to spend the night or maybe two. Not sure about the next couple of days. Most likely I'll begin traveling toward Wisconsin tomorrow and visit another water protector in Western Wisconsin Friday night. Not sure after that. Tired but very appreciative that things seem to be working out.

His photo is of me smiling, it's been a long time since I've done that. As I was taking a photograph of the turtles an hour ago (delayed posting) I noticed a car stopping down......

His photo is of me smiling, it's been a long time since I've done that. As I was taking a photograph of the turtles an hour ago (delayed posting) I noticed a car stopping down the country road across from me. after a while a tall handsome middle-aged fellow begin walking on his side of the street toward the vehicle, hesitant. I said hello and he said hello. We had the most wonderful, painful, sad, Joyous 10 minute conversation, tho I'm afraid I did most of the talking. Frequently he was obviously choking back emotion. I don't think it was what I said as much as he was feeling less alone. About depression, was I ever depressed, did I ever feel sad. He wanted to know my experience because I believe those feelings are Central to him. As I've written and spoken before, I shared with him that only someone that is insane would not be occasionally depressed and sad given the destruction of everything of value going on before eyes. No disrespect to anyone else it is the most important face to face interchange I can recall having in many many days or maybe weeks. We discussed the turtles that I was photographing and with great joy he mentioned Turtle tunnel 2 miles ahead which indeed I went over. He was so glad that in the not-too-distant past efforts had been made to provide a safe Crossing for those Turtles from one wetland to the other. When I mention Standing Rock he also choked Back eMotion, saying that it was very emotional for him. He did not elaborate further and I did not invade his privacy to ask. I didn't mention to him the year in prison for being there I face. Such a privilege, such a joy, to connect heart to heart, soul to soul, with another person. So rare.

Self satisfaction is considered a virtue in this Society, no? I'm sitting....

Self satisfaction is considered a virtue in this Society, no? I'm sitting in a country cafe in a rapidly gentrifying area. Shortly I had to turn on White Noise because I couldn't stand the self-satisfied conversations around me. Everything for our children and grandchildren is rapidly disintegrating, economy, democracy, global environment. And with a Vengeance the folks here talk about everything but what's important. I spoke with a nice fellow earlier when I arrived and he considers himself a Christian. We had a nice respectful conversation. And he was very genuine. And I was certain that I saw wheels turning in his mind reflexively determining how to fit everything I said in a box that was comfortable to him and let him stay unmoved and self-satisfied. This is not unique. But I just haven't thought about it. It is a reflex that our sick culture builds into us, no? How absolutely deadly.

4.18.2017

To try and keep my own walk real, one of the devices that I use is to imagine the parents of Syrian children, or Palestinian children in Gaza, watching me and what I do. And if I, take.....

To try and keep my own walk real, one of the devices that I use is to imagine the parents of Syrian children, or Palestinian children in Gaza, watching me and what I do. And if I, take care of myself, I try to imagine whether they would agree that I am taking care of myself or being criminally self-indulgent as is the American way and as I have done most of my years. To try and keep it real I have them armed with AK-47 rifles which they would be only too happy to use if I deceive myself and misuse my life to further indulge myself rather than serve the neediest on Earth. This helps me walk a path I experience as joyful, one of meaning. I wish more people would find a similar path. But that is ultimately up to them. I with my last breath I will walk the path for the joy of it and there by point the way.

"James, you would go to the mouth of Hell singing Hallelujah, right," a kind friend asked? "I have found no price......

"James, you would go to the mouth of Hell singing Hallelujah, right," a kind friend asked? "I have found no price that I wouldn't gladly pay to alter the horrific future faced by Humanity and all creation. On near-death hunger strikes more than I can count I've been at death's door and wanted to go through but there was no one there to collect the price. For staying and documenting Grandma Regina I face $3,000 in fine and a year in prison as do the 48 of us that remained. I know if no price I wouldn't gladly pay."

To those of you helping ease my credit card debt, bless your hearts. All the repair work done, necessary given the callous heavy-handedness of our sisters and brothers in uniform at Standing Rock, and their agents, all of that has been financed on credit card debt as......

To those of you helping ease my credit card debt, bless your hearts. All the repair work done, necessary given the callous heavy-handedness of our sisters and brothers in uniform at Standing Rock, and their agents, all of that has been financed on credit card debt as has been any lodging at bottom rate motels or state parks, food, as the mission around the country to stir hearts has resumed. The donations from those of you recent and in the past is deeply appreciated, wind under the wings of this work..

Are you a missionary, she asked? I was walking out.......

Are you a missionary, she asked? I was walking out to get something from the vehicle having checked into this non corporate coffee shop so that the vehicle, starve the corporate state, could be in this town on the Main Street for three hours or so. This after purchasing a replacement 16 inch tire for the trailer from a local bike shop Although I could have saved a couple of bucks at Walmart just a mile away. I don't freeload and what money I have I'd rather go to a tip than toward purchasing a product so I have a slightly expired, half off, $1.56 muffin in front of me and I'm nursing coffee from the earlier stop. Are you a missionary, she asked? She had seen my shirt. I didn't know how to answer the question, so I thought for a minute and replied, yes, I suppose that I am.

'James, you are the person from standing rock that I will continue to support in your work. I don't....

'James, you are the person from standing rock that I will continue to support in your work. I don't have much but when I can I'll help you.' This from the dearest soul, that I worked alongside at Standing Rock. A white person, like me, who work themselves sick for the good of the camp and to my eyes, received little more than reverse discrimination in return. The goodness of this person was mistaken for either weakness or vulnerability. I'm deeply touched by the donation just made. And more touched by the faith in me and my work. I replied:  "Bless your heart. Your contributions is a lot and your faith in my work means a great deal. I have almost no active support. This could be evidence that I am wasting my life but I don't think it is. I'm doing the best I know how with every breath. Your kind words mean a lot to me."

What do you do on cloudy days? The question I get asked so often. Two nice guys in a pickup truck at a quick stop where I just bought..... Fr Apr 16....

What do you do on cloudy days? The question I get asked so often. Two nice guys in a pickup truck at a quick stop where I just bought some bananas and bread peanut butter. Truly nice guys with some level of Wonder and awe toward the vehicle. I said, friend, I am absolutely not trying to belittle your question. What do you do when you drive away from the gas pump. I could see him thinking. I use gas from my tanks. And I use electrons that I stored in batteries on sunny days to power me at night and on cloudy days. I went on to share that obviously our politicians are either f****** idiots or are absolutely lying to us. Jeff Flake, congressman from Arizona or someplace like that, just the other day told his constituents in a meeting, I can't promote solar energy because people need electricity at night. This guy should be locked up for life for either criminal negligence or criminal lying. It was a very pleasant conversation

I fight to win. I'm willing to lose but I fight to win. I see a a path to victory that I walk on though it is extremely Slim. Do you know a true activist in history that has done anything less? Fr Apr 16

I fight to win. I'm willing to lose but I fight to win. I see a a path to victory that I walk on though it is extremely Slim. Do you know a true activist in history that has done anything less?

Spoiler alert; my liberal sisters and brothers, we are not winning. We..... Fr Apr 16...

Spoiler alert; my liberal sisters and brothers, we are not winning. We are not close to winning. Maybe it has something to do with the fact that we never honestly faceless horror. If and when anyone is going to it comma if anyone is going to face and to try and see a way out of it, I hope they consider contacting me.

An hour or two ago I commented that what may be the Hallmark of mental and spiritual health, the ready capacity for Wonder and awe, has rarely been seen by me in Minnesota. Whereas..... Fr Apr 16....

An hour or two ago I commented that what may be the Hallmark of mental and spiritual health, the ready capacity for Wonder and awe, has rarely been seen by me in Minnesota. Whereas that is true it implies that Minnesota may be the problem. That will be unclear to me for months. Yes, it is in stark contrast to my experience traveling through the states beginning in North Carolina and ending in North Dakota November twenty-eight or so. But geography is not the only thing that has changed. It could well be that another six months of of this dying economy has driven people into fear and fear certainly extinguishes the capacity for Wonder and awe. It could be the presence of trump and his cast of Horrors who have egg on our spirit of hatred. Or it could be Minnesota. The coming months will tell me more.

Finally I am learning from life to be more glad at the hatred from those who drive by then the kind words knowingly expressed by the informed. The..... Fr Apr 14th

Finally I am learning from life to be more glad at the hatred from those who drive by then the kind words knowingly expressed by the informed. The kind informed already show by their behavior they will not change, they will not stand up. They know, and yet they do not do. Hope lies with those who do not know and the fury they hurl at me they also surface for themselves and might possibly learn from it. The informed they already know and are not open to learning anything new. The exceptions prove the rule. If the shoe does not fit do not wear it. I came not for the well, but for the sick, my teacher rightly said.

4.15.2017

Reagan lit the match for economic Armageddon, Bill and Hillary Clinton provided the gasoline.

Reagan lit the match for economic Armageddon,
Bill and Hillary Clinton
provided the gasoline.

4.14.2017

"God bless you," she said. "He just did," I said. She got it, and was stirred at the thought. I was.....

"God bless you," she said. "He just did," I said. She got it, and was stirred at the thought. I was sitting on the asphalt with my back toward the Aldi parking lot eating a can of $0.87 corn beef hash I had just purchased for lunch. May I give you this, she asked? And she placed several curled up dollar bills in my hand. I recognized her from the checkout line where she was just before me and as she was leaving she turned quickly and said to me, I love Jesus too. To which I said, as you do unto the least of these you do unto me. She didn't say anything to that and I thought maybe she didn't like me saying it. So I was surprised that she got my attention in the parking lot. Moments later there was a car behind me and I heard a gentleman's voice and looked, it was her husband, she was driving the car. They wanted to speak more and know what I was doing. They were moved at this Mission, what I'm doing. It was typical of quite a few such encounters when I was in a Walmart parking lot, Home Depot parking lot, elsewhere around town, Caribou Coffee earlier in the morning. Where are you going, they ask. Wherever Hearts can be stirred, I replied. Where is your home? Like my teacher said, the son of man has nowhere to lay his head.

4.13.2017

The lady before you paid for the next few customers. No charge for your medium cup of coffee." Maybe this was exactly true. More likely I think is that someone bought for Ho......

"The lady before you paid for the next few customers. No charge for your medium cup of coffee." Maybe this was exactly true. More likely I think is that someone bought for homeless people. They guessed I was one maybe. LOL, my teacher said, the son of man has nowhere to rest his head. Either way what a kind thing and what an important seed she planted. Speaking of planting seeds, that's the purpose of the vehicle, that's the purpose of this Mission, that's the purpose of my life, and maybe it should be the purpose of at all. Objectively. Though my body is not particularly happy about it my soul has us select spots such as this where I can sit and work and the vehicle, and I with my signage, can be seen. The next few days are rain and full clouds. As I try to not push this old body too far too fast, today's Journey will be short, about 30 miles, to a state park that seems to be open. I'll use that as a low cost base of operations to take the vehicle around to spots such as this in what is now bedroom communities for Minneapolis, hence fairly dense populations.

Inconceivable to proceed without a winning strategy, the professional, surgical, military team.... Activists? Cruel suggestion!

Inconceivable to proceed without a winning strategy, the professional, surgical, military team.... Activists? Cruel suggestion!

True activists are exactly those who are oblivious to the excruciating pain of criticism. They experience it but.....

True activists are exactly those who are oblivious to the excruciating pain of criticism. They experience it but embrace and transcend it because all they care about is winning for their constituents, for their cause. For those one-in-a-million, Mission success is everything and no personal price is too great, no personal pain is too huge to bear. And they are the first to criticize themselves and the last to discourage others from doing so for the risk of losing valuable input and insight.

Fellow Boomers, we unleashed the environmental, political, and economic Armageddon. Stop waiting to die and get out and fix it.

Fellow Boomers,
we unleashed the environmental, political, and economic Armageddon.
Stop waiting to die and get out and fix it.

Male, female, native, non-native, etcetera... We've already lost if all we can do is replace one dominant group with another.

Male, female, native, non-native, etcetera...  We've already lost if all we can do is replace one dominant group with another.

What is more evil than seeing a group pursue a fatal path, and not speaking up? Such a coward I am not.

What is more evil than seeing a group pursue a fatal path, and not speaking up?
Such a coward
I am not.

Am I a Christian, they often ask? No, I reply. I just stand with the man Jesus, as best I can.

Am I a Christian, they often ask? No, I reply. I just stand with the man Jesus, as best I can.

Fatal flaw of the Giants Hedges and Chomsky: never will they criticize their followers. Only empty flattery.

Fatal flaw of the Giants Hedges and Chomsky: never will they criticize their followers. Only empty flattery.

4.12.2017

Activism is such an amazing group. It exists to pass judgement on others and never on itself, not by itself, not by anyone else. Extraordinary

Activism is such an amazing group. It exists to pass judgement on others and never on itself, not by itself, not by anyone else. Extraordinary

Certain failure is expected of those not embracing criticism from within and without, no? Activists?

Certain failure is expected of those not embracing criticism from within and without, no? Activists?

Here’s why the D.C. pundits came to love Bill Clinton: He almost did it. He almost achieved that great coalescence of the professional and business classes.

Here’s why the D.C. pundits came to love Bill Clinton: He almost did it. He almost achieved that great coalescence of the professional and business classes.

Washington and the prosperous, well-educated fellows who inhabit it. Every one of them knows that the real problem with government is what they call entitlement spending, meaning Social Security and Medicare; that the obvious solution is some sort of privatization; and also that every

### “All agreed”; “all accepted.” It’s difficult for outsiders to understand the kind of hypnotic appeal such invocations of consensus hold for Washington and the prosperous, well-educated fellows who inhabit it. Every one of them knows that the real problem with government is what they call entitlement spending, meaning Social Security and Medicare; that the obvious solution is some sort of privatization; and also that every other responsible, professional-class person either agrees on this matter or else is a charlatan or demagogue of some species or other.
I have heard some expression of this consensus since the day I met my first congressional staffer back in the Eighties. I’ve heard it from certain kinds of Democrats as well as Republicans; from losers as well as winners. As with free trade and welfare reform, there is no amount of reporting or argument that will budge this idée fixe; people of a certain educational background simply know it to be true.  Thomas Frank, listen liberal

4.11.2017

"Well, solar energy is still pretty expensive," the shopkeeper said. "I think destroying our children's future is pretty expensive," I replied. "Well, that's true," he said, seeming to mean it.

"Well, solar energy is still pretty expensive," the shopkeeper said. "I think destroying our children's future is pretty expensive," I replied. "Well, that's true," he said, seeming to mean it.

Stop asking, how can I fix everything? Start asking, what is my best attempt right now? Do that. Keep asking.

Stop asking, how can I fix everything?
Start asking, what is my best attempt right now?
Do that. Keep asking.

Traveling through Minnesota is heartbreaking. The only employment, Walmart. People are unnecessary, just their remaining pennies.

Traveling through Minnesota is heartbreaking. The only employment, Walmart. People are unnecessary, just their remaining pennies.

4.10.2017

To see no honest path to Victory, no matter how remote, is to unilaterally accept defeat. The 'left' for decades.

To see no honest path to Victory, no matter how remote, is to unilaterally accept defeat.
The 'left' for decades.

A very dear, Christward-looking fellow posted today directing his followers to a beautiful nature scene and suggesting they look for the beautiful around them. My reply: Friend, I share this.....

A very dear, Christward-looking fellow  posted today  directing his followers  to a beautiful nature scene  and suggesting they look for the beautiful around them. My reply: Friend, I share this as a duty as a brother. I will unfollow you because I find posts like, that beautiful nature scene, it's so important to find the good things around us, so dissonant with My Soul. I don't have the energy for the distraction, not that you should care, and absolutely I mean no offense. The Jesus that I know never would have written such a thing, never thought such a thing. The Jesus that I know realized that life, Joy, is in looking in the opposite direction. Yes, the ultimate counterintuitive. Life is found in seeing, in looking for, in finding, the most in pain, the most suffering, and serving in solidarity from the soul to improve their situation or die trying. Joy is in the exact opposite direction of pleasure. Does Someone Like Jesus not find positive experience in a beautiful sunset? Of course. It comes with the territory. Do they look at it? Do they look for it? Do they direct others there? As you do unto the least of these you do unto me. I am not trying to reopen a dialogue. We've discussed this many times. Your brother forever, no matter what, James

To an acquaintance that has some familiarity with my writing and work of the last year: "It is odd to me that no one understands I have always fought to win. With every.....

To an acquaintance that has some familiarity with my writing and work of the last year: "It is odd to me that no one understands I have always fought to win. With every breath I fight to win and that includes seeing how the victory can be achieved through my action despite how infinitesimally likely that is. In my entire adulthood I have never allowed myself the luxury fighting without a vision that is reality based in how Victory can be achieved thereby. This could be the entirety of why I fight alone." The fellow replied, respectfully and kindly, in a way that suggests he found what I said ridiculous. As near as I can tell everyone finds what I write and say ridiculous at the core. A superficial level many people like it. But at the deeper level at which I try to operate, ridiculous.  "If at first the idea is not absurd, and has no hope." Albert Einstein

I would infinitely rather be deliberately ignored, disliked, considered......

I would infinitely rather be deliberately ignored, disliked, considered ridiculous, or even hated, than to simply be enjoyed, unnoticed, or taken for granted.

4.09.2017

Are you going through Ohio, a nice fellow asked. I replied, Creator knows. Seriously. I watch for signs of where I can do the most good. I have.....

Are you going through Ohio, a nice fellow asked. I replied, Creator knows. Seriously.  I watch for signs of where I can do the most good. I have some interest in Flint and Detroit. Those are in the directions of Ohio. Also some interest in the pipeline fight in Lancaster Pennsylvania. But so far near zero support either Financial or places to plant my sleeping bag and or tent are materializing. That could grind things to a halt pretty soon.

Not quite sure how this 65 year old body does it. Maybe it's nothing significant. From pretty much a standing start, yesterday was 30 miles.... M

Not quite sure how this 65 year old body does it. Maybe it's nothing significant. From pretty much a standing start, yesterday was 30 miles and today was another 30. my knees are bothering me a bit. unlike my Sprint to Standing Rock from North Carolina, this time I am using the vehicle as a bike assisted by the Sun. I'm really quite amazed and delighted. In addition to me there is a 250 pound payload, the vehicle and what I carry. I'm amazed that on gentle terrain such as this part of the country traveling at 9 miles an hour on a overcast, zero Sun, day like today, I leave with a full battery and I arrive with a full battery. I'm doing about half the work according to my torque sensor, About 15 watt per mile, and the Sun and motor are doing about the same. 5 solar panels, 500 watts , is just about right. On sunny days it will provide enough energy that instead of averaging 9 miles an hour I can stay battery neutral at probably 12 miles an hour. I was a bit worried about carrying a 4th panel on the trailer because that made it longer but so far my concern seems to be unfounded. the strong suggestion from me is that others need to start pulling solar trailers behind their electrified bicycles to encourage renewable energy for others and for the fun of it.

"Be safe," "Be careful," kindly folks often say to me. From the neediest on Earth and in the future I hear something different, "Keep yourself In Harm's Way," "be effective," "live our emergency," "save us or die trying."

"Be safe," "Be careful," kindly folks often say to me. From the neediest on Earth and in the future I hear something different, "Keep yourself In Harm's Way," "be effective," "live our emergency," "save us or die trying."

4.08.2017

Save the world now. Nothing less is worth the effort.

Save the world now. Nothing less  is
worth the effort.

4.07.2017

If the choice is between global thermonuclear war that rapidly annihilates all of the human plague, or status quo, I choose war.

If the choice is between global thermonuclear war that rapidly annihilates all of the human plague, or status quo,
I choose war.

Those whose future I fight for have a duty to support this mission. The worker, the soldier, is due his wages.

Those whose future I fight for have a duty to support this mission. The worker, the soldier, is due his wages.

By virtue of our DNA  design we are agents of Creation in small tribes, and the Agents of Destruction in larger and or hitech groups.

By virtue of our DNA  design we are agents of Creation in small tribes, and the Agents of Destruction in larger and or hitech groups.

No, everything is not fine. My depression has been periodic in my life, an inspirational and creative friend. Yes I have understandably.....

No, everything is not fine. My depression has been periodic in my life, an inspirational and creative friend. Yes I have understandably worked to surmount the depression. I no longer find that this is called for for me. My job, the job of all of us is and must be, to stir people's hearts. Fun, Pleasant, nice to be around, is not what the world needs from me, or you. Disturbed, mildly depressed. Not as an act, but as the only sane response to what is being done by us to all creation. One of the few great psychologists, Abraham Maslow, was asked at an august convention where he was speaking, dr. Maslow you cite Abraham Lincoln as iconic of human health , yet Lincoln was known to be depressive. Maslow replied, you think someone being depressed in the midst of a civil war Slaughter is a sign of unhealthy?

4.06.2017

In a couple more days it will be ready to roll. Major progress.....

For full post including pictures, click link: https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=10210879887746138&id=1620551416

In a couple more days it will be ready to roll. Major progress on the punch list again all day today. The notion of a solar trailer is pretty significant. This is a second generation of the trailer. Some important upgrade features are noted in the photographs below and a description of each photograph. The challenges include lightweight, low cost, reliability even in moderate wind conditions, the ability to tie down in the event of extreme winds. The ability to angle the panel left or right to catch full sun. The ability to have panels extended Way Beyond the vehicle so that if the vehicle is casting Shadows at least some of the panels will still be generating electricity. And on and on.  I suggest that if you are really interested in promoting renewable energy that you do something like I have even if you don't extremely need it. As it sits here this vehicle is about $12,000, but it is only a third of that or less and functional parts, $3 to 4000. and then it's basically free except for $120 in tires every thousand miles ( quite standard on a bike)  and  $0.10 a mile  for the depletion of lithium ion batteries.  And in another couple of years it'll be less than that simply because there will be places to rebuild the batteries which is very inexpensive. The stylish cab from Organic Transit, don't buy it unless you want zero, zero, zero, support, the stylish cab is needed or beneficial for the full-time campaign I wage. It is 80% of the cost. It could easily be an under $500 Schwinn tricycle with a $600 motor. Or it could be a more sophisticated two thousand-dollar motorized trike. Or most likely still it could simply be  a  motorized bicycle  with just one or two panels.  If you can commute around a city like I did around Washington DC with a motorized bike and a panel you wouldn't plug your batteries in anytime within a year most likely. Why aren't you doing something like this? If you're serious about getting people to think about renewable energy, in time for it to matter, you'll seriously consider this and some of you will do it. Oh, and the American flags you wonder? Yes, I detest with every cell in my body the America that behaves as it does today and for most of its existence. But I refuse to surrender what I was told it stood for when I was in kindergarten, freedom and justice for all, give me your tired your poor your huddled masses yearning to be free. I refuse to surrender that.

4.05.2017

Left Right and Center hate the Truth. They love what confirms their biases.

Left Right and Center hate the Truth.
They love what confirms their biases.

Exploration for life, to plant seeds, to Kindle Fires, will resume soon. Another.....

### Exploration for life, to plant seeds, to Kindle Fires, will resume soon. Another two full days of repair work and the vehicle should be almost ready but departure cannot resume until after Friday when a very expensive battery arrives that was used up on the Sprint from North Carolina to Standing Rock last fall. If you have recommendations of folks who would like to provide a night's lodging,  (traveling in the Midwest region for the next several months), or folks that should receive a visit, please let me know and I'll begin to put things on maps. Departure is from Bemidji Minnesota. Directions will be determined by you, in part,  which of you reply with what suggestions. He wept, wiped tears from his eyes, the nice, large, late forties man in his big white pickup truck, as he heard the story of the vehicle, the journey, the quest. He was deeply moved by my rhetorical question, what are we leaving our kids and grandkids? His heart was most definitely stirred. The one thing required, the only thing required, for a decent future for all creation is stirred Hearts. Sometimes this journey does that. Also, donations are welcome and needed at my email address start underscore loving at yahoo.com. (Those of you that watch this journey but never help, if the words, voyeurism, freeloader, do not fit, please don't wear them.)

Another all-day attack on the repair and upgrade of the vehicle prior to resumption of the search for life in the United States begun.....

Another all-day attack on the repair and upgrade of the vehicle prior to resumption of the search for life in the United States begun last September 2nd and resuming this weekend I expect. Major progress on the punch list. Major dapl repairs now complete. Many minor enhancements done and some left to go. Thank you mr. Credit card.

Where am I traveling next? This question is regularly

Where am I traveling next? This question is regularly asked. Wherever I might be found, my answer. Jesus' answer, too, I suspect.

Online they had a menu it said two pancakes for $2. I just learned from the very very kind warm-hearted waitress that the menu online......

Online they had a menu it said two pancakes for $2. I just learned from the very very kind warm-hearted waitress that the menu online is old and they don't know how to take it down. This after I indicated there was nothing on their menu I could afford. I'll buy your pancakes she said. I had hoped it would be a high-traffic local restaurant where people have the chance to have their hearts stirred by the vehicle. And on that count I was correct. So that's how I justify the expense of a two or three dollar breakfast.

Regarding Syria: What I know is that I don't know what's going on in Syria, and neither do you. They have.....

Regarding Syria: What I know is that I don't know what's going on in Syria, and neither do you. They have oil, they sit on valuable oil Transit routes, and they don't do what the United States tells them to. You don't think your government is lying to you? Do you think your government would hesitate for one second to conduct a gas attack on Syrians for oil?

4.02.2017

Real activists fight to win. Faux activists fight because it makes them feel good. Their opposition fights to win.

Real activists fight to win.
Faux activists fight because it makes them feel good.
Their opposition fights to win.

"I envy you for what you're doing sir," he said. "I wish I were free to do it."  "Everyone can do it," I said. "All you......

"I envy you for what you're doing sir," he said. "I wish I were free to do it."  "Everyone can do it," I said. "All you have to do is lay down everything that Society tells us to value. Going on twenty years now ago I forsaw that everything was collapsing, the economy, democracy, environment. I said to myself, 'James, what are you doing about this?' The answer was, 'Making excuses for myself why I couldn't try.' Once I saw that, I was unable to keep making excuses and I've been trying to get in the way ever since." I added, "And yes, just like the man Jesus said it would, it has cost me everything, husband, wife, houses, fields, son, daughter, and it has brought on persecutions... $300,000 a year career in high-tech, everything that goes with that, most recently facing a year in prison and $3,000 fine for standing up for human rights of our native sisters and brothers and our water at Standing Rock... oh, and thousands of dollars and cost done by our sisters and brothers in uniform to this vehicle and my belongings on the day of the arrest.."  I simply told him the truth. I don't think he liked to the answer. Did the truth sstir his heart? It doesn't seem it, but who knows? In time?

Thank you parking lot sister. Yesterday she gave me $3. "Do you collect money," she asked? "This is all.....

Thank you parking lot sister. Yesterday she gave me $3. "Do you collect money," she asked? "This is all I have."  "I accept donations," I said. and then she came back half an hour later and gave much more. (I never ask in word or mannerism, not if I am on death's door, I will not ask. I do share the opportunity from time to time. How can I not offer to share this banquet of Daily Bread, of opportunity to serve in solidarity from the soul?) " I'm going away for the weekend, and I thought to myself, how can you go away for the weekend and not help someone who is working for our young ones?" Her kindness moved me deeply then and now. The $20 is partly on the table with this breakfast. But the kindness, that's what moves me. That's Creator where I see It and secondarily in nature. This yesterday in the hardware store parking lot where I had been working all day. Maybe 15% of what I spent in the store yesterday. LOL. Credit cards. She had gone in shopping for half an hour. An early forties woman. Lived in Sudan at some point and I mentioned to her my first Washington DC hunger strike of 50 days, February in Washington DC, 24 hours a day in front of the Sudanese embassy, very cold as I recall.  2007, trying to stop the genocide in Darfur.

A soldier of War for the Corp.s is wounded, you spare no expense. But a soldier of Loving for you and yours? Meh. So, no peace. If the shoe doesn't fit, don't wear it.

A soldier of War for the Corp.s is wounded, you spare no expense.
But a soldier of Loving for you and yours? Meh.
So, no peace.
If the shoe doesn't fit, don't wear it.

3.31.2017

Please, may I buy you a proper lunch? This the nice lady asked......

Please, may I buy you a proper lunch? This the nice lady asked when she heard me talking to a young couple with their one-and-a-half-year-old here in the hardware store parking lot  about my work at Standing Rock and around the country trying to give our young ones a chance of a decent future. She guessed, correctly, that the can of nuts was my meal for the day. . This is the second day of working to repair the Damage Done by our sisters and brothers in uniform at Standing Rock when I refused to abandon native grandmother Regina Brave. Bless your heart, I said to the lady. I didn't tell her that this was the fourth donation received for the thousands of dollars of Damage Done standing for the future of humanity. I've been at this a long time. I expected nothing else. I expected to fight alone. I fight alone. You few exceptions know who you are and bless your hearts. The joy is mine. I wish others could find the joy. I'll continue to try and show the way. Two solar panels are in the boxes but first repair to major damage to the plastic of the vehicle has to take place and I'm experimenting with how acrylic deals with drill holes and holds up to the pressure and response to glue. I'm also experimenting with the length of the trailer and making it much easier to angle toward the Sun. Getting to Standing Rock from North Carolina consumed a $750 battery and hopefully a  replacement will arrive, did I mention credit cards, hopefully a replacement will arrive by  Wednesday of next week and I'll depart around the country. Credit cards, Can't live with them, can't live without them.

3.27.2017

$2,300 GoFundThis. Water protector James Mcginley recovering, repairing, resuming Fight for creation. Dapple Unleashed $1,100 violence on my solar fueled bicycle car, and my possessions February 23rd......

$2,300 GoFundThis. {{{Canceled due to total lack of interest. 1 donation, $100. Mission will resume anyway on credit card debt only. This is what I expected.}}. Water protector James McGinley recovering, repairing, resuming Fight for creation.

Donations to this GoFundThis as of today, Wedsday, $100.

Dapple Unleashed $1,100 violence on my solar fueled bicycle car, and my possessions February 23rd before during and after arresting the 48 of us, of the earlier 12000, that remained and stood that last day. This the price the State exacted for my decision to stand with Grandma Regina Brave of Oglala tribe rather than leave the camp as had been my plan the night before. I had stayed for months to stand with my native sisters and brothers for their human rights as indigenous people, and when I learned that she had remained in camp the 23rd the decision for me was clear and I spent the day chronicling her talk, her arrest, and then the events of the day with one video receiving more than 80,000 views. I would make the same decision every time.

As a consequence of that decision thousands of dollars of possessions, pretty much everything that I had, was destroyed because I decided to Chronicle her rather than get the stuff safely out of the camp as I had an option to do. I would make the same decision every time. Oh, and yes,  like the rest of the 48 I face what I understand to be $5,000 in fines and a year in prison to be decided later this year or early next.

This week I am replacing way less than half of what was destroyed so that I can resume the journey that I interrupted for Standing Rock, a mission across the country to try and massage the hearts of as many Souls as I can encounter per day stimulating their hearts with this solar fueled bicycle car and it's messages about waging love, indigenous rights, and starving the corporate snake.

As of tonight the credit card debt is beyond $1,000,  to replace basic possessions including a second change of clothes, to repairing  the broken roof of the vehicle .  Plus another $400 for the dental work required because I refused to leave camp in January when teeth became damaged.
By week's end another $700 to replace the lithium ion battery that I pretty well exhausted in the 2 month 1700 mile Journey from North Carolina to Standing Rock that was completed in a 4 day sprint ending two hours before the snowstorm in late November. And then there's the $25 per day (1st month) to fuel that journey going forward across the country speaking to people in convenience stores, gas stations, churches, intentional communities, camps, about radical Brotherhood, putting our lives on the line for the next Generations, starving the corporate snake, well possibly modeling the same with my life.

With your help this work can resume in a healthy fashion. PayPal start_loving@yahoo.com. Without your support it will be ground to dust pretty quickly under this heavy credit card debt. This mission is not to be confused with the Oceti construction crew  ( Joe Britt Jr., Val Armstrong, Eric Wallace-senft ) with whom I've been traveling and providing what little support I can. They are  conducting their own fundraising and please watch and support them.

Without Loving it is nothing.

Without Loving it is nothing.

The fool insists that he has all the answers. The wise man prays that someone has at least a few.

The fool insists that he has all the answers.
The wise man prays that someone has
at least a few.

Why Liberals are no better for the world than conservatives: CONSERVATIVE : loves that those unlike them suffer in punishment. LIBERAL: dislikes.....

Why Liberals are no better for the world than conservatives:
CONSERVATIVE : loves that those unlike them suffer in punishment.
LIBERAL: dislikes that those unlike them suffer but not enough to pay the price to stop it.
RADICAL: detests that those unlike them suffer and is unable to avoid paying the price that might stop it.

Hmmmm, I wonder how this will turn out? Activists fight to fight and feel good, corporate capitalists fight to win.

Hmmmm, I wonder how this will turn out? Activists fight to fight and feel good, corporate capitalists fight to win.

3.26.2017

Which way are you headed, my activists sister asked? If I resume my cross-country Ministry, not sure. Maybe East from northern Minnesota over to Lansing Michigan where......

Which way are you headed, my activists sister asked? If I resume my cross-country Ministry, not sure. Maybe East from northern Minnesota over to Lansing Michigan where a fella has an interest in building a next-generation solar trailer with me. But maybe more likely is south and then West. I have some thought of visiting intentional communities along the way, unannounced, LOL. I have lost so much confidence in these protest camps that are sprouting up. They use Standing Rock as the model. WTF? We didn't stop anything at Standing Rock. We didn't come close to stopping anything at Standing Rock. How is that the model? Yes, there were three days during the nine months that were really good actions. Nobody thinks about those when they set up these new camps. These are my sisters and brothers, they're doing the best they know. But it's way too little way too late. I lost hope long ago, years before Standing Rock. But I have not lost the need to fight the best fight I can with my last breath so this is what I do. It sure makes it harder doing it without hope.

To my activist sister: I detest affording myself the luxury of false optimism or false pessimism. And if......

To my activist sister: I detest affording myself the luxury of false optimism or false pessimism. And if the truth is hopeless, then that's what I face. But often that pushes me to one final place, that whereas I live to try and save all of creation, yes, by fighting the good fight, Maybe someone in the future will be helped to fight the good and joyful fight. As I wrote earlier today, that's really the only Heaven that is available to us I'm sure. And I'm okay with that. Yes, it's hell at the same time, but that's okay too.

To my activist sister who is the real deal, who inquired about my expectation of resuming my cross-country heart massage Ministry: I've had.....

To my activist sister who is the real deal, who inquired about my expectation of resuming my cross-country heart massage Ministry: I've had this idea many times before but it's really gripping me again today. The idea of heart massage,  that is my work. I don't know about you, but I suspect it's not much different. When two people first encounter each other there sometimes is an openness, soul to soul. But doesn't that dry up really fast? Within minutes, within hours? The conversation may go on for years but it has moved away from the heart, away from the soul, into the head and flesh. I find absolutely no hope in the head and the flesh. They're easy. But without the heart engaged? Without love it is nothing.

Most people find soul to soul conversations undesirable. I find everything but extremely painful. Always have.

Most people find soul to soul conversations undesirable. I find everything but extremely painful. Always have.

Though I think we are all four sad about it, it remains the case that there is room on the Oceti construction crew now, for people who are good at Construction, but not for.....

Though I think we are all four sad about it, it remains the case that there is room on the Oceti construction crew now, for people who are good at Construction, but not for those who are not, or even for willing trainees.  This may change in a month or two if they find and begin construction on location. Then maybe they would be able to use, to take advantage of, unskilled laborers like me. So we either decide for me to be a millstone around their neck, though almost no one acts like I am, and I continue to let what skills I have go to waste, or I resume my missionary work across the country, massaging what Hearts I can along the way on my vehicle. I had really hoped that the crew would be traveling in the direction of Lansing Michigan where there is a friend who is able and interested in rebuilding my vehicle and constructing a next-generation trailer. But probably that is no longer the case. One of my options is to repair the vehicle as best I can here and begin traveling in his Direction, an approximately One Thousand Mile Journey. Anyone have any clever ideas how I could get from northern Minnesota with my vehicle and trailer to Lansing Michigan more quickly than that, please let me know. LOL.

Jesus discovery made simple: Folks, you think that heaven is in the direction of selfish pleasure for me and mine. Yes, I know.......

Jesus discovery made simple: Folks, you think that heaven is in the direction of selfish pleasure for me and mine.  Yes, I know you don't call it this, but this is what you go after. This is what you devote your life to. This is your religion. But that's not how our psychology works. The infinite peace of heart, Joy, passion is in exactly the opposite direction, in solidarity serving the neediest from the soul. Yes, I know that for 2,000 years you have been unwilling to see this. You are pretty much out of time now.  Like I showed you, if you would hold on to your life, you shall lose it. If you would lose your life for the sake of your neediest on Earth, you will gain it.

The solution is realizing that everyone is our family. Everyone. No exceptions, at any time.

The solution is realizing that everyone is our family. Everyone.
No exceptions,
at any time.

My business is heart massage. I'd Lost clarity on that for a while.

My business is
heart massage.
I'd Lost clarity
on that for a while.

3.25.2017

Why do intentional communities fail? It is clear to me, and I'll guess no one will see it as I do. But......

Why do intentional communities fail?  It is clear to me, and I'll guess no one will see it as I do.  But I see it through a life of studying, and practicing in this domain.  They fail because they have never pursued the absurd notion that the purpose of community is not to serve the members, but rather, out of burning love, empathy, compassion... solidarity, the  purpose of the community is to serve and save the world, starting with the neediest (Blue line). They always pursue a combination of work and fun / Pleasure (green line), missing that Joy is the fruit of Loving,  and Joy to those few who know it, absolutely trumps fun/pleasure, every breath. Joy/Meaning, is the only infinite motivator. I'm doing my own next level pondering and reflection on this. This probably unintelligible graph is reflective of some of the pondering I'm doing:

"James, you are the greatest skier, technically, I have ever seen," said a lifelong Utah Rockies resident, a fellow executive, to me in 1996. Possibly he meant it, possibly.....

"James, you are the greatest skier, technically, I have ever seen," said a lifelong Utah Rockies resident, a fellow executive, to me in 1996.  Possibly he meant it, possibly there was some objective truth to it.  "You are technically the greatest strategic, new, organization creator, leader, I have ever seen," has said no one, but I say it now. Lol.  Yes, I do.  I was and am unknown as a skier or such a leader.  And I have zero track record  the last 15 years in not for profit work to substantiate this.  But although unknown, in fact, my 25 years in industry was a string of small to medium, impossible successes, the turn-around or creation of groups that produced the impossible, with explosive joy, in impossibly short timeframes against impossible odds.  MLK Jr, and Gandhi were of the type.  My estimate is that were they alive today they would have no more success than I have in the not-for-profit realm.  I think the people of Soul, of Heart they were able to work with, such folks no longer exist in the toxic climate of 2017 earth.

My vision, mission, work, life, every breath: In Solidarity Serving the neediest from the Soul..., Loving.

My vision, mission, work, life, every breath:
In Solidarity
Serving the neediest
from the Soul..., Loving.

Trump's advantage, and the only advantage he needs, is the unwillingness of the Liberals to fully see the horror he is unleashing.

Trump's advantage, and the only advantage he needs, is the unwillingness of the Liberals to fully see the horror he is unleashing.

3.24.2017

No one wants to be the revolution (pic below): Oh how I wish the solution was law, policy, architecture, renewable energy, protest, protecting, resistance, camps, meetings, decolinization, the Lakota way, the Christian religion.... Those are so easily......

No one wants to be the revolution (pic below):
Oh how I wish the solution was law, policy, architecture, renewable energy, protest, protecting, resistance, camps, meetings, decolinization, the Lakota way, the organized religion, party,  a leader, democracy, socialism, Sanders.... Those are so easily doable, so fun.
But they have never been the answer. They will never be the answer, though they would in many cases be ubiquitous if we ever seriously pursued the answer. We can't get there from there. We can't avoid getting there from where the answer is, the religiously loving, by whatever name or no name at all, practiced with every breath by the large masses of human beings.
We will work to change anything and everything so that there is a future for our children, everything, except the only thing that can save them... changing ourselves, Being the Revolution. To be the change the world needs to see, as Gandhi rightly said.  No one will even seriously consider being the revolution. So sad. Except when I rarely get distracted, I can't think of anything else, I can't try to do anything else. It is what I will try and do. It is the only thing of hope that any of us can try and do. We will try anything and everything else until  there is no time, no hope, left. Oh well. Kathy Green: " They say that change is like heaven, a beautiful idea, but no one wants to go first."

No one wants to be the revolution (pic below): Oh how I wish the solution was law, policy, architecture, renewable energy, protest, protecting, resistance, camps, meetings, decolinization, the Lakota way, the Christian religion.... Those are so easily.....

No one wants to be the revolution (pic below): Oh how I wish the solution was law, policy, architecture, renewable energy, protest, protecting, resistance, camps, meetings, decolinization, the Lakota way, the Christian religion.... Those are so easily doable, so fun. But they have never been the answer. They will never be the answer, though they would be ubiquitous if we ever seriously pursued the answer. We can't get there from there. We can't avoid getting there from where the answer is, the religion of loving by whatever name or no name at all, practiced with every breath by the large masses of human beings. We will change anything and everything So that there is a future for our children, everything, except the only thing that can save them... Changing ourselves, Being the Revolution. To be the change the world needs to see, as Gandhi rightly said. We will change everything but ourselves, the only thing that could give creation a future.  No one will even seriously consider being the revolution. So sad. Except when I rarely get distracted, I can't think of anything else, I can try to do anything else. Oh well.

3.21.2017

Recapturing Lovely......

Recapturing Lovely.

Is there only one notion of lovey, of beautiful?

The old tale, Emperor and the Nightingale, address is this question. The story is as old as time, no?

Unless we have been insanely pursuing a mistaken notion of lovely, beautiful, where is the Hope?

But if we have been insanely pursuing a wrong notion of beauty, of lovely, then there is profound hope.

Standing Rock, the camp established to protect the Waters of the Missouri River, was aesthetically, visually, beautiful in the fall. During the winter months it was visually and physically quite materially ugly, hellish even. Inches of mud. Below zero nights and days. Ice everywhere, everywhere, everywhere... perfectly suited to breaking bones and skulls. Muddy dark army tents for meals. The world's largest police state glaring over us every moment with snipers on Hills, helicopters, planes, with folks relishing the idea of killing us.

But now a month after the camps are shut down by the police state, there is a regular stream of posts from those who are expressing their longing for being back at the camp. They are profoundly distressed at being back in what civilization prefers: safety, ease, Comfort, opulence, leisure.

What's going on?

Standing Rock was nearly everything that our society considers ugly. But to many who were there, far from all, but to many, it was and is beautiful, the epitome of lovely.

Whether or not we can put words to it, there was Supreme beauty, supreme loveliness, at Standing Rock in at least two ways.

1. There was the Supreme beauty of the opportunity to radically serve our fellow humans, indeed, all of creation. That's why many of us were there. To try and serve by putting ourselves in the way of the total Destruction of everything as well as we knew how. Exquisitely lovely.

2. It was an exquisitely beautiful, lovely, way of life, really, the only way of life. Huh? Yes. In truth. Though almost none of us in society can see it, it was a way of life, a way of living, that starved that which is killing us, the corporate capitalist consumerist state of things. It is killing us. It will finish the job in months unless we in huge masses move to a way of living that starves it.

3. And it was the, objectively iffy, way of life lived by many of us there. Huh? Yes. Every form of healthy tissue in every organism is designed to feel ultimate reward by using every single second to serve the well-being of the larger Collective. I know of no objective science or thought that can understand it any other way. That is, except for the life-form cancer. Think about it.

Yes, there were many many many Slackers at Standing Rock. But those in whom you would see Joy from sunup to sundown in the midst of the hellish conditions, in those you would find that they thrived on ways of serving, mostly small, from Sun up until the time they went to bed. Cutting wood for others, shoveling snow for others, cooking meals for others, washing dishes and pots for others, deliberately being a source of spiritual kindness, and uplift, for others. Tending the fire real in the fire pit, and ultimately in the heart.  Among these people you could cut the joy with a knife. Few had experienced such Joy, such piece of heart, such loveliness, such beauty, ever before, or since.

Did those of us at Standing Rock do this perfectly? No. But with few if any exceptions we lived on the land, on our mother earth, in a way that even 7 or 10 billion people doing so could do so for eons. This as opposed to the way that we worship in our sick culture, which probably can't sustain even the Next Generation.

We all understand this in our heads, don't we?

But some of us at Standing Rock, whether or not we realized it, we understood it in our hearts, our souls. And we knew it as heaven. We saw, what to almost all eyes was material ugliness personified, but instead we saw ultimate Beauty. The beauty of a sustainable Earth forever.

Not to be critical or disparaging. Nearly all attempts at sustainability thus far has started with an assumption, we need to maintain our consumerist preferences but do so without destroying Earth. Inheriting this is a notion of beauty.

What is the ultimate Beauty is in a thermal Mass, Earth bearing structure, with virtually none of the trappings that we have been taught are essential in this culture, that can support people whose lives are made up of every breath serving their sisters and brothers out of love, that's their entertainment, that's their amusement? What is that Community, including the structures, were as Perpetual as the Earth and stone piled on top of them? What if even to build they cost maybe $3,000 per person? That is, extremely affordable.

What if? A different world is possible.

How was more rich, the emperor that first preferred the Nightingale in nature, or second, the emperor that had learned to prefer the mechanical Nightingale?

Who was more rich, the emotionally healthiest of our native sisters and brothers that lived on this land 5000 years ago comma living the beauty, the loveliness, of creation? Or is it those of us in this culture today, the most highly medicated culture that there has ever been comma with a lower reported quality of life than many if not most Nations on Earth, and way below the materially modest country this was even back in the 1950s?

Another world is possible. The world called for in Oceti Infinity Communities ( http://oceti-infinity-communities.weebly.com/) is the world of beauty. It is the natural Nightingale. It is the last and only hope. By this name, by this effort, or by some other. It is the only hope. There is no time left.

3.19.2017

If Trump and his cast of monsters do not hate, revile, abhor, hold in contempt, all of us that are not in their criminally Rich tiny Circle, if they really don't, how else can their behavior be explained? I was.....

If Trump and his cast of monsters do not hate, revile, abhor, hold in contempt, all of us that are not in their criminally Rich tiny Circle, if they really don't, how else can their behavior be explained? I was born and raised among them. They view us the way most of us view a cockroach. If the cockroach is in a glass aquarium we find it amusing and may even have an affection for it, may well feed it even. If it gets close to us most of us feel loathing and if to close, we kill it, and feel hatred toward it.

Isn't our cultural view regarding work the start of all our problems? I'm sure that it is. We fail to distinguish between meaningful work and.....

Isn't our cultural view regarding work the start of all our problems? I'm sure that it is. We fail to distinguish between meaningful work and meaningless work. We live the mistaken idea that all work is meaningless. Meaningless work is drudgery. But every bit of healthy tissue in every form of life is designed exactly for an unending, every breath, existence of meaningful work and presumably it is designed to find that the optimal experience. Certainly my own experience is that being engaged in meaningful work, totally devoted myself to that, totally absorbed, is the Supreme Human Experience.

To this a kind soul wrote:  I don't know. Is meaningless work drudgery? Doing the dishes is drudgery and so is cleaning the toilet but it must be done. And to do it when no one pays you to is an act of love.

My reply:  I only do dishes, and I have done a massive amount of dishes including this morning, I only do dishes when I see it as a way to serve a larger important good. I have chosen to avoid doing any meaningless work, work that I cannot see how it helps others in an important way, I have avoided this at all costs for close to 15 years now. Meaningless work is what almost all of us do to make a living, instead of making life for ourselves and others.

A useful dividing line to determine sanity vs. Insanity is whether the individual, or the group, Strongly tends to rigidly bias toward their own view, their own.....

A useful dividing line to determine sanity vs. Insanity is whether the individual, or the group, Strongly tends to rigidly bias toward their own view, their own set of information, over the information and or views outside of themself. The great Alfred Adler referred to this in terms of private logic vs common sense, as I recall. Or maybe he said private logic vs public logic. An intrinsic preference for my Truth, versus the truth. An example that occurs to me is David Nash, depicted accurately I suspect in the movie, A Beautiful Mind. David was a brilliant professor at Princeton. He had an extremely active mind. Created understandings of the world which he found compelling. They led to him to view that his children and wife were mortal enemies and on the verge of acting on that view he thought of something new. Maybe just because the views in his mind were detailed and compelling, maybe they weren't correct. He spent the rest of his life acting on that later conception, that not everything in his mind was correct, and he tried very hard to understand the truth as opposed to his own truth. Much more importantly there are few on the left in this country, there are few on the right in this country , that are much interested in the truth available to us all. They are interested in the portion of the truth that their respective groups find comfortable and are opposed to understanding the more comprehensive truth that could embrace all parties.

We through corporate capitalism, are our own Jailer, our own destroyers. The Unimaginable, the......

We through corporate capitalism, are our own Jailer, our own destroyers.  The Unimaginable, the unthinkable, is the truth in 2017. The global elites always have viewed we masses as a blight, a plague, except when it is useful to exploit us. Global warming, corporate capitalist destruction of 'our' environment, is the 'Gestapo,' the "Death squads," they need not pay for, WE pay for, they profit from. We through corporate capitalism, are our own Jailer, our own destroyers.

3.18.2017

CSCCS Update. My view: What the state did to us ( Joe Britt Jr., Val Armstrong, Eric Wallace-senft, James Mcginley ) before and during Standing Rock concluding with their arrest and savagery by the state February 23rd and since, we have had a lot of healing......

CSCCS Update. My view: What the state did to us ( Joe Britt Jr., Val Armstrong, Eric Wallace-senft, James Mcginley ) before and during Standing Rock concluding with their arrest and savagery by the state February 23rd and since, we have had a lot of healing to do, a lot of regrouping, rethinking, damaged control, rebuilding, recovery, collectively and individually.....

And we have had a lot of work to do, team-building, beginning to create a shared vision, evaluation of various land and team options although so far very preliminary.

It is my sense that a powerful shared Vision and team cohesion may be emerging.

Maybe much more in the next next several days but for now, it appears that his team of four that needs to grow rapidly with similarly committed, passionate, devoted Souls, this team of four is headed toward New England and upon arriving there will have evaluated maybe half a dozen or more alternative sites for their ability to best support creation of the First Community to begin when the weather is warm enough in May.

Much more funding is needed, to complete this trip, phase one, and to begin the construction, phrase two. More strong hearts and bodies are needed. But it appears that things are coming together and come hell or high water we will begin constructing somewhere in May.

Again I say, this is my view, and I speak for no one else.

Again I say I expect more to be forthcoming tomorrow.

Be advised, the four of us seem to have an appetite for nothing less then giving the world a final chance. This is based on a realistic assessment of all of us being right on the edge of a cliff. It is not based on some crazy idea that we know we will succeed although some of us may correctly have such a view. For me I simply know that I am unwilling to try anything less.

Again I say more clarity will be coming forth this early as tomorrow including opportunities for people to begin to more seriously join in with hearts minds and treasure to advance the probabilities of this project offering to the world what the world needs. Communities it starve the corporate capitalist State. Communities that feed the soul of all involved as completely as today's culture Stars those same Souls.

By the end of next week I expect that a mutual evaluation in what may be the spiritually and culturally most promising of our opportunities should be complete in the preliminary beer in northern Minnesota, and I expect we will be headed to potential opportunities in Wisconsin, Michigan, Ohio, Pennsylvania and onward.

Without your involvement starting now, by sharing this and other similar posts over the next coming days, without you putting your back into this the potential will not pay realized.

3.15.2017

I am learning that the more decent a person I can become in my actions, the more decent human being, the more I can be a mortal threat to the capitalist corporate fascist state. That's the path, now I just have to learn how to do it well.

I am learning that the more decent a person I can become in my actions, the more decent human being, the more I can be a mortal threat to the capitalist corporate fascist state. That's the path, now I just have to learn how to do it well.

Water protectors, I don't suspect that the following will make me more popular with you. But what.......

Water protectors, I don't suspect that the following will make me more popular with you. But what kind of brother would I be if I shied away from speaking what I consider to be important truth? Rarely if ever does a revolutionary Force emerge and last as a revolutionary Force for more than weeks or a couple of months. It quickly devolves into some form of echo chamber Social Club. Judging from the posts that I see on the internet I believe this is happening to the people that were in Standing Rock. It might not be too late to reverse the slide.

I perceive that anyone that professes to fight the Doom of corporate capitalism instantly defeats themselves the moment that they allow themselves a double standard. It is......

I perceive that anyone that professes to fight the Doom of corporate capitalism instantly defeats themselves the moment that they allow themselves a double standard. It is vanishingly rare that someone that understands himself as the opposition holds himself to as high a standard as they tell their opposition that they should stand to, let alone actually standing to a higher standard, a higher morality which would be really powerful. Everyone wants a revolution. No one wants to be the revolution. The only power that the opposition to the corporate capitalist state can look to is moral power and we squander it and squander it and squander it and squander it.

Who or what is in control, is a horribly consequential thing, no? Some, of all ages, totally freak out if.....

Who or what is in control, is a horribly consequential thing, no?

Some, of all ages, totally freak out if they personally are not in control. Others, of all ages, totally freak out if some strong man, some Authority, an "expert," a "visionary," is not in control telling them what to do. Some freak out if institutional sorts of things are not in control, Academia, science come to mind.

I freak out when any of these are in control. At least on consequential things I do. I freak out.

I trust none of these things when they are in control.

What I trust in control is the human soul, The Souls of human beings, totally subordinating themselves to the well-being of the neediest among them, and hopefully, needfully, passionately devoted to a well-developed, mutually developed, vision of how to serve the larger Collective. I totally freak out when this is not the case, if what is it steak is consequential, and I never involve myself in anything less.

As a Young, Junior, executive in a large computer company I was told that yes, after all my whining, they would support correcting a large Consulting Group in the Pennsylvania area that served the national market for which I was responsible, if I would go and take charge of it. This was a terrifying Prospect. The group was literally hated throughout the country. It was going to take a miracle to turn this around and there was no time.

I remember marching into this room where most of these executive Consultants were far more senior and had far more years than I. I told them, I am not in charge here. What is in charge here is the mission that we have developed to serve our clients and our company. The one we have all just spent weeks in dialogue, expensive and painful dialogue, developing. If you are looking to me or some person to be in charge, "the " leader, this is not the right Organization for you any longer.

There was confused silence. But in not too many hours or days when they saw that I meant it, there was an explosion of energy, creativity, passion, proactivity, Effectiveness, and joy. These were decent people that had been told that they worked for a general manager prior, and that their job was to make money. When they saw that I meant what I said, through my actions, they experienced being profoundly empowered, respected, freed to fully utilize their abilities, to harness their souls their hearts their minds to serve other people.

In three months time this large organization went from being the most hated, to among the most revered groups in the company, as measured through extensive surveys.

Rare is the case when the things that we need to learn, the answers we need to find, are not on the opposite side of a perceived obstacle of pain, even of Terror. Sometimes......

Rare is the case when the things that we need to learn, the answers we need to find, are not on the opposite side of a perceived obstacle of pain, even of Terror. Sometimes when we find the loving, wisdom and courage to go through that obstacle rather than run in Terror from it, we find that the growth was more than worth the effort, and sometimes too, that the pain was much much less than we anticipated. True, if it doesn't kill you you grow, and if you don't risk pain, and sometimes even death, you don't grow.

I find the pain of the horror we've created for ourselves just almost unbearable. But I find doing......

I find the pain of the horror we've created for ourselves just almost unbearable. But I find doing what little I can to try and change the direction is enough to keep me going with joy. Teresa of Calcutta said, if I love until it hurts, there is no more hurt, there is only more love. I agree with the latter part. There's still nearly unbearable pain but it's less than the joy of loving.

By this sick culture we are taught to be afraid of disagreement, we are taught to be afraid of those who are different, ideas that are different, that which is unlike us. It has taken me......

[This is a wordy, but I think important, stream-of-consciousness that came out of some conversations I was blessed to have this morning with my companions.]

By this sick culture we are taught to be afraid of disagreement, we are taught to be afraid of those who are different, ideas that are different, that which is unlike us. It has taken me decades but at long last I  have learned to relish these, and to pretty well transcend the psychological pain that comes with doing so.

I fear not benefiting from these differences, not learning from them, not growing from them, fast enough. I suspected this is what I fear most of all. Why? Because I'm not nearly good enough to be the change in the world that I need to see. & I know I'm not smart enough to figure it out all by myself. And that nor is anyone else. There is a part that I must play but unless I can continue to find that in others which does not yet exist in me, and which is part of the solution that is needed, than I'm of no hope, but useless.

We must learn to relish our important differences.

What I am afraid of is the absence of courageous, compassionate, voracious search for the truth, often in potentially frightening dialogue, including courageously and compassionately and respectfully exploring the important differences between us that we might learn from each other and learn how to joyful fit with one another.

It is said that when two people are the same one of them is not needed. This is very true. I wish I had all the answers. I am so painfully aware that I do not. I am also painfully aware that no credit to me I have more than my share of the answers. But maybe, I hope, you have some of the answers that I lack and if I find the courage, if I find the wisdom to put my ego aside, and fearlessly engage with you to explore our differences, and if you are willing to do the same, maybe we can both become more useful to the future of creation. 

I find all hope in embracing a way of being that is opposite the fear of difference that our sick culture has so ingrained in us, and so values. Why? Not because I value all difference intrinsically. Donald Trump is very different than me and I don't value all of his differences, I hate many of them. I view them as cancer.

But everyone has, or had, the ability to pursue and learn the truth. Not my truth, Not Your Truth, but the objective truth that is out there according to the likes of Einstein and Jesus and Buddha and Gandhi , and that we can if we try very hard get closer to.

Gandhi said the truth is God. He said God is truth, and truth is God. There is no difference. Thereby he said that all hope is in people moving closer to the truth.

I believe that all hope is in this and only in finding a passion and courage to compassionately seek the truth in ourselves and others do we have a prayer of moving to a future worth living for the coming Generations.

In my experience doing this requires enormous courage and bearing the pain of our imperfect nervous systems that have been taught all sorts of reasons to fear being perceived as not having all the answers. Unless we fix this in ourselves real fast and develop a passion for pursuing the truth at near any personal cost, all hope has already been lost.

[Oh, people on the left, progressives, liberals, they pursue the truth in this way intrinsically? Yes, indeed they're certain they do. In case you suspect this might not be the case, you will find confirmation of that in a recent truthdig video of Chris Hedges speaking with the author of The recently published book, Postcards From the death of America, or something like that. I recommend it. It did not help my depression of the last week or so. Be warned.]

3.13.2017

From my earliest memory pain is what I was afraid of, my own suffering, or that of people close to me , never death, I never then or now remember being afraid of my own death. I experience.....

From my earliest memory pain is what I was afraid of, my own suffering, or that of people close to me , never death, I never then or now remember being afraid of my own death.

I experience that my relationship to suffering, my own, maybe changing in a way that I find promising and even wonderful.

Weeks ago anticipating the possibility of tremendous suffering at the hands of the police state, my own suffering, and the potential of prolong suffering for years in prison as a consequence, I reported that all of a sudden I felt my spirit evolving. I began to find that if I looked to my left or my right I could see my children and their parents in Syria who's suffering will always exceed mine, and the parents and children in Palestine where it is exactly the same , and or the parents or children in u.s. Israeli prisons suffering tortures I'll never suffer no matter what. And that in doing this my Terror went away.

Today I had two teeth extracted. When the dentist looked at my x-rays and how deeply embedded The Roots were in the bone he almost groaned. He was a master. No one could have done a better job. Few could have done nearly as well.

But I have had similar teeth work in recent years and again, my relationship to my own suffering is changing. In anticipation of the pain I rapidly summon into my mind children and adults being savagely tortured in Israeli jails for simply being non-jewish human beings whose land the white settlers want at any price to the Palestinians. My worry about my own suffering and my experience of it diminished tremendously.

If this is a passing technique and in the future does not help me I will report this but I suspect it is a tremendous Evolution and gift for me.

For me the present, 2017, and the future, is the greatest emergency ever confronting Humanity or all of creation. One might say that the Cuban Missile Crisis was.....

For me the present, 2017, and the future, is the greatest emergency ever confronting Humanity or all of creation. One might say that the Cuban Missile Crisis was similar, but I disagree. Nuclear war has the Saving Grace of maybe Exterminating everything and eliminating all suffering, near instantaneously, or in just a few years. Unless some impossible Miracle or Miracles are worked now, 2017, radically altering the future, there will be Untold Generations living in material and psychological hell due to the ravages of uncontrolled corporate capitalism, global warming, and fascism.

I live this emergency, the urgency. I make it my business to live this emergency because no where else can I find the motivation, Clarity, guidance I need to control my pitiful, Breath by breath actions, or the intense providing Joy of trying to help.

My first visit to jail was 12 years ago at the Pentagon when I non-violently was protesting the military corporate Empire. It was nothing in retrospect, but it was pretty alarming to me, the jail part, at the time. Even back then that's so urgent I thought it was to try and stop the empire.

The urgency I feel regarding global warming drove me to occupy the Canadian embassy , the hosts of the earth killing tar Sands, for over 400 Days twenty-four hours a day 3 years ago, including a 50-day hunger strike that caused me to be hospitalized. And knowing that it was likely to be fatal,  passed on  cancer treatment  so that I could continue the vigil and hunger strike. yes, it turns out they were able to save me, mostly to the surprise of the doctors when they were able to begin treatment four months late. It had rapidly spread,  but not as far as they expected. Nobody should be impressed with this. Nobody was impressed with this though there were a couple of LA Times articles. But I don't do things to impress, I do things to fulfill the dictates of my soul as best they tell me to reduce, possibly reduce, the suffering of my Global family, present and future.

A recent situation has caused me to reflect on my life in a way that I haven't done in many months or probably years, in this particular direction. And what I remember is that I have known, painfully, throughout my adulthood, that the only place that I either fit, or feel fulfilled, is when two things are true:

1. There is by any objective measure an emergency which if not dealt with with impossible speed will cause tremendous suffering to individuals, such as the needless demise of a company or Department, or creation incinerating global warming, or the continuance of the genocide in US/Israeli Palestine....

2. The other element which often is not present even when the first one is, really usually is not present even when the first one is, is at least a core group of people that either Live the truth of the emergency, or that I can gently and quickly help see the truth of the emergency at which point they then live it with every ounce of their strength. The family emergency response, as I have written of for many many years.

When both of those elements are not present I am a fish out of water, a cause of dissension unintentionally but unavoidably, a cause of friction, absolutely miserable, and probably people around me become miserable as well.

I instantly withdraw myself from such situations when I determine that they are not going to be changed. In the late '90's I made such a decision, it in part was influenced by this and cost me roughly $300,000 per year. I didn't hesitate. It is not my purpose in life to cause other people discomfort, quite the opposite, and I am unable to allow even one second of my time, one breath, to not be fully utilized.

This has resulted in me fighting alone , many would see it as my choice, I understand it as a square peg not fitting in a round hole, but either way this has caused me to fight alone for most of the last 15 years, and I suspect this will be true for the rest of my days.

Epiphany, for me? The best scholarship I know on the historical Jesus, Dominic crossan of the Jesus seminar, says that the central feature, the central mission, of the man Jesus was.....

Epiphany, for me? The best scholarship I know on the historical Jesus, Dominic Crossan of the Jesus seminar, says that the central feature, the central mission, of the man Jesus was to preserve the one thing that those masses being destroyed by the Roman Empire could hold onto if they chose, their community, being family to one another, regardless of how incredibly difficult the Roman Empire made that through their savagery.

The communal meal was not symbolic, it was the central Ministry. His Central message was, you must not allow this savagery to destroy that which is most sacred, your unconditional loving, your being unconditional family one to another, especially the outcast, the enemy...

I have known and been impressed by this scholarly insight for many years. But just this morning several things are colliding in my mind, the fact that more than half of this country now lives in objective material poverty, the fact that the most joyous larger community that I have ever personally witnessed lived in considerable material misery at Standing Rock for months , that the most joyful body of people of any huge size that ever was on this continent were the Native Americans before Columbus arrived, and this recollection of Jesus teaching.

When 15 years ago I left a $300,000 a year career in Industry and became an elementary school guidance counselor in one of the country's largest and neediest elementary schools, Chester Pennsylvania , I was aware of a problem that I never adequately solved at the time, what did I want for these children, these materially poor children, did I want them to become part of the sick society that created them? I now have a much better understanding of the answer.

The answer is hinted at in a vision that I shared some days ago, ( please see Link in comments below).

When, as I hope occurs, I soon resume my travels across the country I expect to add to my itinerary places like Detroit where I think there may be some fertile ground for sewing/cultivating this seed, for helping the materially poor in cities and places like that to possibly see that their opportunity is not to seek the faux-Heaven, the actual hell, that Mammon tells us looks like the capitalist society, but the heaven that Jesus spoke of, from each according to their ability, to each according to their need. The world Gandhi hinted at, a world that has enough for everyone's need, but not enough for anyone's greed.